Decades of League Cup woe for Celtic

IS the draw for the semis at Rugby park after tonights match

podium , well done jinksboy

a sneaky podium from a rare poster?

Im a bit puzzled - I posted at 1208 yet Pauls article is timed at 1209

Psychic Celts

time for the youngsters to get a shot

Hutchison and Sheridan up front please Gordon

both on fire

The only trophies that matter are the SPL trophy and the cup with the big ears.

Regards Wossy and Bwand

Im sure I read that leaving offensive messages on an answering machine is a crime.

That being so - surely that would qualify as Gross Misconduct in anyones company regulations never mind the BBC

A rare top 10 appearance

now to read article!

I am of the opinion that this cup competition is a complete waste of time for our First 11, and WGS should blood some of our younger squad members.
It would hopefully/ultimately bring an end to a worthless cup competition that puts extra strain on players who already have a busy fixture list.

Regards,
KH.

If you or I left the meesages Brand and Ross did I'm pretty sure we would be arrested. And we would also lose our jobs if found to be using company time/phone to make the calls.

Sack the pair of them. Brand in particular is an irritating sod at the best of times.

Mccourt and Mizuno on the wings?

or is Koki still not fit?

And meesages was a typo and not intended to be an imitation of Manuel on Fawlty Towers !

student bhoy

He played 90 minutes at Inverness on Monday and by all accounts made a couple and hit the bar near the end of the match

ALL trophies matter to this Bhoy ! I've always hated the huns' record in this competition and it's always puzzled me why the Big Mhan's went down the stank annaw ! Beat them all I say and do it with the personnel required.

Anyhoo, apologies for re-posting, but I'm still in the dark re, freeview programmes.

From the last thread.

Cadizzy and Abu Dhabi Bhoy, thanks for the info Ghuys. My problem is not being able to find the channel on Sky, it's the bar staff in my CSC who dare not interfere with the set-up for fear of putting the Bhoys on the big screen and denying the "home" punters their english fitba ! As far as I know, they have two boxes, Sky and a freeview set-up (I think) and they can chop and change the 4 screens to show 4 different programmes (I think again !) So my dilema is, do I go there in the hope that they know what they're doing, or can I find it on the cable receiver I've got in my digs (whatever kind that might be and does it make a difference ?)

Vmhan, gave me a wee chuckle there and I'm just sorry I was running late (as ever and guess what old Ghuy made that happen !?) and I never got to catch up. Hopefully next time huh ? And please send me the link when you can 'cos I'm sure it'll come in handy if not tonight, then at a later date.

pablophanque

cheers jinksybhoy, reckon he has a shout at getting a game tonight?

not seen any of him yet but he sounds like a player

student bhoy

I watched him a couple of months ago against TFOD reserves and he looked ok but still learning the game here and maybe a bit lightweight. he needs time and strengthening

I would noy imagine WGS would start him tonight given that he played 90 mins in Inverness on Monday then I would imagine they had a day off yesterday.

And the pain from 1983-4 (???) where that *insert expletive here* McCoist got the winner in ET still rankles.........Grrrrrrrrrrr.

Brand, typical of what passes for "Entertainer" in this bis that is definitely not "Show". The tommy Steele of the 00's

pablophanque

from previous post Mick asked me

"Do you know she's living in Scotland now?"

Mick, was that meant for somebody else in error/

Cheers

Pablo -
Reccently any games the beeb have shown they have also linked to on the bbc sport website, and it looks like they are doing the same tonight.
Anyone in the UK can stream the game live, normally there is a link on the football section.

pablo

Im not sure if you can get it on freeview where you live but I have a wee dongle (no jokes pleeeeese) for freeview that plugs into my laptop and I can get all the freeview channels that way. I live in Glasgow though so as I said maybe someone darn sarth can advise on freeview signals there.

thanks again jinksybhoy

makes sense he wont be starting if he just played 90 on monday.
good to have good youngsters coming thru though.

agree on Hutchison and Sheridan up front

mon the hoops

pablophanque - if the cable provider is Virgin I think you can get BBC1 Scotland on channel 862 or thereabouts.

Paul67

I want to win the trophy because...well Celts are in it! But I think we should use the opportunity to use the pool players to keep them match fit and provide an opportunity for a few to perhaps force their way into the team more regularly.

As you've stated before on here there are some important games coming up, and I also think some of the regular first team need a rest (Naka's knackered), lets see what the fringe players can do.

The weather is pretty bad down here, hailstones and the like.

Hows the weather in Kilmarnock ?

Vmhan aw

Re Brand and Ross

I have to say I'm in Mort's camp on this one. Have the rest of you even heard what was broadcast? Or just going on what the media have said? If it's the latter I'd suggest double standards based on what we all seem to think of the media when the report on things closer to home!

The message was left by way of a little (funny, IMHO) song. Bad taste? Most probably. But how many comedians at the top of their game don't push the boundries?

The biggest defence of the pair is that it was a pre-recorded show so someone (a producer of the show) deemed it acceptable to go out.

If we start down this road with comedians then where does it stop?

And it wasn't the grand daughter's ALLEGED sexual activity - she's gone on record as admitting to being a past lover of Russell Brand.

Surely there are better things for the PM and the BBC to be worrying about than this............

EHIY

Meanwhile, out on the desolate wind swept expanses of the Humber estuary the Cleethorpes CSC feat. Pablo wait to see if Lovely Rita's dexterous knob twiddling can conjure up the desired result.

Blantyrekev from previous article

;-)))))

Aye, my feet and mouth seem to work in a weird tandem when on a pitch! I think it is some mad disease called foot and mouth...

I DO remember questioning the number of refs on the pitch in that game! You hit the nail on the head, a fairly hefty dollop of paranoia, which surely is ridiculous in a Celtic Supporters tournament!!!

How funny was the lad in that team, NOT knowing what to do when the other ball came flying over the fence??!! That must have wasted at least 14 seconds!!! ;-)

And I know our boy won't mind me saying (cos we slagged him all the way up to CP about it) but his OG was a peach. That game really had everything, except a goal from us u and a card for me!!!

Dunno about you but I'm looking forward to next year already!

Like Celtic, I won't neccessarily see getting out of the group again as a progression, more like me staying on the pitch and keeping my mouth shut, now THAT would be what you call progress!!!!

Blantyrekev, yer a gent!!!

craggy island gaa

Judging by the reactions on here when we were eliminated at Celtic Park the last two seasons I'll take the 'meaningless trophy' stuff with a pinch of salt.

If we could team up with our Old Firm 'partners' then I'd accept playing a reserve team and not wanting to win it. As it happens, if we don't win it they do. And that's not an option, I did not enjoy that March day when they won this trophy (their first in three years). Ultimately, a win tonight will probably be more meaningful in 6 months than a win next Wednesday. How sad is that?

Full team, or close to it, for me!

Vmhan :- I'm about five mile from the ground and right now is windy with squally showers.

EHIY

I didnt hear the original show but did hear the offending sections and have to say Wossy was very juvenile in the things he was saying in the background.

Not sure if this carried onto Sachs machine but although the Andrew is/was a comic actor he has a right to be offended and if that act is deemed criminal and he gives evidence then its trouble at mill.

IMHO its up to Andrew sachs to complain - as far as the public go - its Brand and Woss on the radio - thats how they make their names these days.

Ed- in a balloon?

.

" Life's Like a Box of Chocolats....Every Day....You Don't Know Wat.... Yer Gonna Get...."

o1ForrestGumpStillRunninCSC

Vmhan aw, playing fringe players works until you lose, then it feels like the worst idea.

The winning habit is required.

EHIY

Agree that someone should have stopped it if they thought it would be likely to offend but the furore this has created has been astonishing. I heard the song on sat night and didn't think too much more about it until I saw it again in the papers and on the news.

At least something important in the world has happened and the newspapers and tv can stop talking about trivial news stories such as banks going bust, rising unemployment or the collapse of the housing market.

Hang the pair o' them.

If anyone is struggling to get the game on Freeview/Satellite , try here

The actual sites will be available from 3pm . I would suggest TicTalk if it's available but keep the sound down if children are present - the guy seems to have an entertaining dose of 'Tourets' !!

Emsh, thanks for that mate. The only problem being, the wireless network goes from 4meg down to zero at the drop of a hat :o(

Jinkysboy, I brought said dongle down with me from back home on Sunday, unfortunately, I left the sofware disc at home ....double :(

Boltonbhoy, I've been wracking my brains trying to remember what kind of Freeview it is. It's a small transparent blue box. About 6" x 5". I have no idea if it's Virgin but thanx for the info.

DBBIA, I remember them well. So what was it like when your "wireless" also doubled as your sideboard ?

pablophanque

EHIY - 'The biggest defence of the pair is that it was a pre recorded show and someone deemed it suitable to go out' ? Eh ?Sorry, but thats nonsense. So you're saying that the actual act of them phoning up this guy and saying what they did was ok purely because someone 'deemed' it ok to be aired ?

What about the act itself ?

I agree there are better things for the PM to be worried about, but not the BBC. It was two BBC employees who made the malicious call.

I've haven't heard the calls, but I read the transcript, and what they said was appalling.

How funny would you think it was if you were Mr Sachs ?

DBBIA :- A ballon? In Ayrshire? Ha! Them modern city slicker types may find it acceptable to fly in their new fangled contraptions but down here us simple folk keep to natures laws and burn any aeronauts that fall into our hands.

I am very much for the Arsene Wenger approach to the CIS Cup - play as many of the reserves/young bhoys as merit it and give them a go.
I think they would give everything they have in order to catch the manager's attention in a full game against SPL opposition rather than just on the training pitch or in a reserve match.
Be interesting to note how well they do.

I HATE getting beaten at anything - I especially hate being beaten by those Killie rats Jeffries and Brown, not to tmention the majority of killie fans - and love nothing more than winning trophies, but if the young Bhoys are given a chance and are not up to the task then so be it, I can live with that.

I feel that the majority of our 1st choice 11 should be rested with the League game at Swinecastle being our priority and bearing mind the small match we have ahead of us next Wednesday too!

BlantyreKev,

Thanks earlier for the praise in your excellent summation of saturday's events.
Re. my thoughts on next year's event. I thought it might be a good idea for the social side of things too as most of the Bhoys had disappeared by the time it was over and so we never got a good chance to have a blether, bit of banter/craic etc aftewards. I know how successful the Golf day has been, but it is also a great social event too and I thought the 5s could be every bit as much a success on that side too.
However far be it from me to stick my tuppence worth in to an event that you, Des, Andy etc ran so well.
I am more than happy to leave it in your capable hands.

As for the 11's select, I would say that unless we put the team into an Over 35s league then i shall leave that to the younger members of the CQN. In saying that, there were more than enough on show to prove that it potentially could have be a right good team!

As for the summer KO, it just wouldn't seem right playing football outside without at least a gale and heavy rain to add some real Scots weather to the proceedings :-)

HAIL! HAIL!
Token

I am all for introducing young players and I think that Ben has earned at least a place on the bench.

What I am totally against gifting rangers an easy trophy.

We have given this one away too many times in my lifetime.

This is the first leg of the treble and as rangers players have been talking up trebles since the Kaunus game we need to put a stop to that starting tonight.

More of the same spirit with a bit more composure at the back than we saw on Saturday will see us through.

Seville.67

re Woss and Brand

The message didn't actually go onto Sach's machine. That never happens with these calls. Sachs only heard it when he was invited to by the Beeb.

Couldn't give a monkey's either way. Both are love 'em or hate'em comdedians.

jinkysboy

I think you've got it spot on. I fully agree it's Sachs' feelings that are all that really matter here. And if he were to complain (maybe has?)then fair play, do a full investigation.

But to me this just smacks of the Mary Whitehouse hand ringing brigade, jumping on the bandwagon.

There is no doubt in my mind that the bulk if not all of the 18,000 complainers did not hear the original broadcast.

EHIY

Paul67

Sometimes the wee team can do the business... Glasgow Cup final
Celtc 4-0 .....I know it was the quality street kids and they were quality....I just feel that the weekend game is more important.

DBBA re the Cleethorpes CSC maybe Pablo can borrow Jinksyboy's dongle!

vmhan aw

Thismancriag ,

Language violation !!

Sannabhoy (pedantic csc)

Working at home, as I am today, is a privilege, I know, and the decent wages I earn give me a comfortable, warm and bright place to sit at the computer.

The lack of tight oversight enables me to pick up articles like this and this.

So, here's a campaign we could all get behind and which might actually succeed - let's see if we can get a living wage for everyone who works for Celtic. (I am assuming that the club is not yet signed up to this kind of deal.)

I am going to write to the Chief Executive myself. It would be a great thing if lots of Celtic fans did the same. In particular, shareholders - I know there are plenty who read CQN - would one or two of you drop a line to Peter Lawwell? You should point out that this is the right thing for our club to do, that a lot of the benefit would fall to people who live in the East End, and, to be wee bit cynical, it would be a great help to officers of the club when they are called on to justify high ticket prices. In addition, Celtic, the richest club in the country, would pull off a major public relations coup.

Edward

Im sure Ayrshire, much like Glasgow, has its fair share of balloons.

henriks, I agree Andrew Sachs may find it offensive, but the hysterical bandwagon-jumping of 18,000+ people following a newspaper expose (when there had previously been 2 complaints, both only about Ross' use of the f-word) is all kinds of ridiculous. Bringing it up in Parliament? Prank-calling has always been part and parcel of entertainment - would it have been any different if they'd just said the things to each other on the air with Andrew Sachs listening at home on the radio?

As I alluded to on the previous thread, there are plenty more things being said every day which are equally offensive to the recipient - some of them even broadcast on the BBC (hello, coverage of Partick v Rangers a coupe of weeks ago!), is Gordon Brown forced to comment on them? Are they taking over the front page of every paper?

sannabhoy

spelling violation

equallypedantcsc

:-)

Henriks

See up_over_goal's comment above.

Also, "how would I feel if I was Mr Sachs"? Well I can't claim to be psychic so I can only guess how Andrew Sachs might feel. But given he made his name as a comic actor and worked closely with one of the guys pretty much responsible for the birth of alternative comedy, I would say there is a chance that he might well take it for what it was intended as - that is an attempt at comedy.

up_over_goal

I don't really give a monkeys about the pair of them personally - they're both millionaires so getting sacked won't put them out on the street. It's the attempt at censorship and the moral crusaders brigade that get my goat.

EHIY

Mort,

at 6m a year of our money then I think firing Johnathon Ross is the way to go. The banks need our money now far more than Johnathon Ross. Who is the most deserving is an open debate The fact that Brand had slept with this girl makes it even more appalling in my opinion and she´s the one that´s been labeled a tart! As I said previously when the timing of the information comes to public light is an irrelevance. How much do they get away with that we never hear about? Honestly if any of them had any talent or anything to redeem themselves then the public wouldn´t be gunning for them. Therefore they are privileged. Talentless people who get their wages from the public need to behave and not commit crimes the Royal family could have given them a few lessons. There teas oot! They have misjudged the public perception of them.

Sachs will have a list of top notch lawyers slavering at the mouth and champing at the bit.

raveheart.....If you're around?

Did the Blackpool Shammy contact you? I mentioned you AGAIN on the bus and was told there was definately a place on the (man U game) bus for you and that Steve B would contact you.

Its £20 return on the bus for members, probably £25 return for non-members. It's a luxury coach and value for money especially if you're sitting near the no.2 son as the seat comes with free beverage, to quench you're thirst lol.

vmhan aw

Jinkysboy :- If you were to walk through some of the towns on a Fri or Sat night you would have no doubts at all.
For somke strange reason a lot of them seem to congregate around the bottom of the Bridgegate in Irvine, I think their is some sort of supporters club down there or something. Perhaps IrvineCelt could confirm :-)

sorry MORT above post should be addresed to EHIY

Play some kids and some first team regulars. Job done.

Now I'm off to register my utter disgust with the BBC . The 'One' show starting at Seven - I'm writing to my MP and calling the police. Get me the prime minister!

PrankCallsOnTheBBCCausedTheCurrentGlobalCrisis CSC

The Angry Drunk

We should play the yoofs and the fringers. Its too difficult and pressured to play the young guys in league games - unless you have many injuries like with Cillian now! But no-one cares about the skol cup unless its the final or we're playing the huns. And be honest - if we're not in the final we don't really care.

Cheers Edwardsrus......

Any chance of the game being cancelled ?

vmhan aw

Attempts to put an Ayrshireman in space get off to a low-key start.

.

Is Mary WhiteHouse....Amy's Granny....????

Surely Not....

o1bhoy

Aussie tim.
From the previous thread 7.50am.

It was nice to meet up with you,and as they say "another face to a name"and your welcome anytime.

Paul67 et,al.

I was at the football on Saturday And thoroughly enjoyed the game,but if it had been dry,I would have enjoyed it much more.
But for the vagaries of our weather I could have sat in my seat without getting the usual drenching,I thought to myself,If only they had extended the roof out another dozen feet,that would have solved my problem.
I sat through the game freezing,soaked,and depressed,but I still enjoyed the game,but with a bit of foresight from Celtic when constructing the Stadium I could have enjoyed it much more.Being freezing,and wet is not condusive to helping you to enjoy your game of football.
My solution would be to get a seat further back in my area of the ground.But who would be the new set of supporters that I would be mixing with,I think it would be hard to get a better lot than I have around me at present.

Anyway the real reason I decided to put down my thoughts was I thought back to when I started supporting Celtic and compared the condition then,as to now.
Fifty odd years ago if you were a kid you got in free if someone lifted you over and there was always a guy who would oblige,a plus point for the fifties.Adults were treated like animals,The foul smell that permeated around the park when the weather was wet was disgusting,but it was mostly our own fault ,we urinated in beer cans which usually got knocked over and you ended up standing in you own as well as everyone else's,You could always use the toilets but they were usually inches deep in urine.
Yes,looking back then we were treated like animals,which a good portion of us were,including myself.

So on reflection the present day is far superior condition-wise than when I started watching the Celtic all those years ago.

Solution,Stop my effing moaning an enjoy the conditions we have at Celtic Park now.

Paul67 I agree totally with your post, it is time we start collecting "Trebles", I believe the Orcs have won more "trebles" than us. Killie away is too tough a game for playing second - stringers, leave that for early rounds of the Scottish Cup or at home against the likes of Hamilton and Falkirk. we are three wins away from walking around Hampden with a trophy besides I cannot stand rearrangers winning anything except notoriety as a bigoted, ugly racist club.

Hail to four in a row and make mine a Treble too boot.

GreedybarstewardsCSC

EHIY ,

apparently , Auntie Beeb only received 2 (two) complaints about language when it originally aired. As a percentage of the listening audience this would be about 0.0005% - quite a small figure.

Unfortunately , in this day and age, with poddy-casts and that YouTube thingy , once something is in the public domain, it's there for keeps.

As far as I'm concerned, sometimes I like Wossy, sometime I don't . Brand, I can't stand.

They were juvenile, unfunny (IMHO) and caught up in their own ego's. To me it's actually worse that it was pre-recorded. Both they and the producers had time to review it (in fact, I believe the producer DID contact Sachs' agent and received permission to broadcast if the 'answerphone' messages were REMOVED - they then chose not to do this and broadcast everything - if that is true, Hell mend them).

Additionally, if Auntie had handled this quicker/better, there wouldn't be this whole furore. But, these 2 whether you like them or not are, currently, bankable assets and the Beeb doesn't want them going elsewhere - if it can help it.

Storm in a t-cup ? You bet.

Infringement of artistic licence ? Mmmm, borderline (IMHO).

Worthy of all the column inches it's received ? NO!

My opinion on the outcome ? Suspension (already happened - Nostradamus) , followed by large fine (donated to charity of Sachs' choice ) , grovelling public apology and an undertaking not to be so bloomin' stupid again. Oh , and the producer will get sacked !

Sannabhoy

.

DIBBA....

Surely Ayrshire Men are Meerly Space Cadett's....

o1moonmanCSC

Awe Naw

Don't worry - I guessed it was for me! ;-)

They are talentless people in your (and possibly a few more than the 18k of complainers) opinion. You won't hear any reports of all the people that found this piece and their other work appealing.

Both however have many millions tuning into their shows both on the box and the wireless (an underused phrase these days!), and Ross in particular has been one of the Beeb's mainstays for years - the ratings are a better judge of the publics opinion.

I honestly don't think Sachs is that bothered - you'll note it's his grand daughter in the rags calling for their heads, rather than him.

EHIY

Vmhan :- I doubt it very much unless the rain (which has stopped just now0 gets a lot heavier.

.

OldTim67....in Case You Missed it....

The Generation Game - A Celtic Quiz....

Have a go at this quiz and see what you can remember over the years and at the end discover what generation of Celtic fan you really are. Answer yes or no to the following questions and count the number of 'yeses' at the end of it.
CAN YOU REMEMBER ANY OF THE FOLLOWING………..?

1. When you were a boy you had free entry to any stadium in Scotland by asking a stranger - 'Gonnae geez a lift in big man'. You did not pay in to a football game until the age of 17 and as you got older you would shave on a Saturday to look younger to avoid doing so.
2. When travelling to a game on a supporters' bus you were allowed to travel for free to encourage the future generation of Celtic fans. This supporters' bus was a London Route master type of double decker with rear entry (where the committee would stand, perilously grabbing hold of the pole as the bus turned a sharp corner) and no doors. Great for air conditioning on sunny days but freezing cold in the winter. On the bus you can remember the 'sweep', a lucky draw which had each player listed home (us) and away (opponents) from 1 to 11. The feeling of euphoria when you picked out any home player from the Celtic forward line from number 7 to 11 had to be experienced to be believed (knowing you had a great chance of winning) and that was only surpassed by winning the damned thing and travelling home weighed down with the princely sum of £1 (a fair sum back then) prize money in your pocket in 5p pieces.
3. Entering the ground by the Rangers end at Parkhead and at half time being able to walk through the Jungle to watch the second half in the Celtic end in the full knowledge that Celtic always shoot into the Celtic end in the second half. The choice of walking through the jungle was a perilous one. Pass through the tunnel underneath and it was two steps forward one step back in the crush. Pass through the bottom of the terracing and wade through 3 inches of urine which came cascading down from the very back. Some choice.
4. The hush at half time when the half time results were read out particularly waiting for the Huns' score and the enormous roar that went up when their opponents were winning. This would lead to huge roar when the Celts took the field for the second half. Yes folks, in those days Celtic and Rangers played on the same day (Saturday) and at 3 o'clock when football should be played. Curiously enough another huge roar of the day would be when Liverpool were losing after the departure of Dalglish to Anfield in 1977.
5. The fence that was put on the jungle. After a few wee mini pitch invasions in the mid 70's the authorities put a small fence around the jungle. This spoiled the view for hundreds of young boys who traditionally had congregated there at the front over the years although they had actually caused the crowd invasions, or 'break-ins' as the papers loved to describe them, in the first place...
6. The wee blue coloured 'bubble cars' that disabled people travelled in and would park behind the Rangers end to watch the match.
7. The bridge over the London Road, just next to the car park, which was demolished in 1983. For generations Celtic fans had huddled under there to shelter from the elements and for generations hordes of Huns had clambered on top of it to reap havoc after another heavy defeat.
8. Watching the viddy printer on Grandstand on a Saturday as the final results rolled in. The feeling of impending doom when ...Aberdeen 2.....was printed on only for the eruption of euphoria as it was followed by ......Celtic 3, announced by a smiling Frank Bough.
9. Listening to David Francey's commentary on a Saturday afternoon on Radio Scotland and hearing his dulcet tones describe Rangers as 'Rrrrangerrrs'.
10. Groups of clergy, not all Catholic priests by any means, grouped together outside the main stand on match days as the clergy were allowed free admission to Parkhead in those days and looking to see if you could spot your Parish Priest amongst them.
11. The site of fans struggling in through the turnstiles with Agnews or Haddows bags with 24 cans of pale ale in them to drink their 'kerry-oot' during the course of the match. This involved seriously inebriated fans consuming even more alcohol and then having the audacity to all and sundry that they had been to the game although they couldn't remember one detail of it. Also, discovering why men brought newspapers to the match which was ultimately responsible for the small lake of urine running along the bottom steps of the Jungle (see 3).
12. Listening to the 9.55 evening sports desk on BBC Radio 2 for the results of midweek games. The disappointment of hearing 'Kilmarnock 1 Celtic 0' in the BBC newsreader's finest English accent is indelibly stamped in my memory after the Scottish cup defeat of 1978. None of your teletext, internet or mobile phones in these days.
13. When super scoreboard on Radio Clyde (261 on the medium wave) wasn't so super. Initially hosted in the mid 70's by Bob Crampsey and Richard Park (nicknamed Ibrox Park by Jock Stein), this show played more pop hits than gave football updates. Old Bob became more uncomfortable with each passing week and eventually sloped off to Radio Scotland, to be replaced by the irreplaceable Jimmy Sanderson.
14. The ubiquitous habit of bottle throwing. The inebriated fan (see 11) who was unhappy with his team's performance would lob his whisky/vodka/wine (delete as appropriate) bottle at the referee only to realise that an Olympic discuss thrower couldn't reach that far and watch as the bottle landed around the small boys huddled in fear at the bottom of the terracing. A favourite pastime of Rangers fans in particular between the years of 1965 and 1974.
15. The sight of the food vendors walking along the terraces at Parkhead. 'Erzi macaroon 'n the speermint chewing guuuuum !' If you think the Celtic catering is bad now..............
16. Buying a programme for 5 pence or as it was known then 5 new pee. At the recent Aalborg game the programme was £4, so much for inflation and the credit crunch.
17. Standing at Hampden in the open Celtic end which had no cover as the Huns stood in the end at Hampden.....with a roof on it. In the rain you would be absolutely drenched and on a hot day the dust would almost choke you. Look at the footage after George McCluskey's winner in the 1980 cup final and watch the cloud of 'stoor' rise into the air as the Celtic fans celebrate wildly
18. The furore caused by Celtic accepting shirt advertising for the first time in 1984. The sad sight of the world famous green and white hoops now prostituted by a horrible big 'CR SMITH' patch on the front of the jersey.
19. Collecting bubble gum cards in the 60's and 70's. 5 cards for 2 pence and a bit of bubble gum so hard it cracked the teeth of children all over Scotland. One Jinky card was worth 10 of any other. 'Got it, got it, need it' and being able to spot potential gamblers of the future as they threw cards against a wall to see who could get nearest. Winner took both cards.
20. The Celtic boot boys of the 1970's. The hooligan fore runners of the casuals, their outfit consisted of outrageously flared denim trousers, tartan patterned jersey a la Bay City Rollers style, doc martin boots, an Irish tri colour draped around the neck to flow from the back like a cape and a Celtic scarf around each wrist.
Now you've done the test then compare your score with the table below to see what category of Celtic fan you are in. How many did you answer yes to ?
15-20 - The 'Eldorado' generation. You are probably one of those old guys in the main stand that shakes their head no matter how well the team are playing and compares (unfavourably) every centre half with Billy, every winger with Jinky and every forward with Kenny. No matter how successful Celtic are, nothing (in your opinion), will compare with the Jock Stein era.
You still pine for the good old days when you could take a half bottle into 'the gemme'. In your mind you do not believe that any of the Lisbon Lions ever, ever had a bad game and believe that playing one man up front is a satanic concept.
5-14 - The 'Internet' generation. You are still scarred from the dark days of the early 90's era and it is likely you became a shareholder in the mid 90's. You might have campaigned to get rid of the old board and are fairly satisfied with the outcome. You probably booed Fergus McCann when he was there but in hindsight are now likely to write to the Vatican asking for his beatification. When things go wrong you cannot wait to access the forums on the internet to vent your spleen and are sad enough to use the aforementioned forums as your own personal problem page for any troubles in
your life.
0-4 - The 'Nike' generation. Oh dear. You don't remember anything from the pre-Larsson days, lucky old you. You laugh when your Dad tells you of the bad old times and cannot comprehend how Celtic could ever play in front of crowds of 20,000 or less in a stadium that was not all seated. You are the type who will queue up at midnight to buy a new jersey on the opening date when the club launches a new kit. You have only ever been to a handful of away games in your life and cannot remember when a Celtic away game was not shown live on one TV station or another. You buy the Celtic View faithfully each week and laugh at the recollection of it as a 6 page newspaper.

o1bhoy

Play the youths tonight or do not?? Hmmmm.

Id play the strongest team possible, but let Ben and Paddy get a run out.

Im also with Thismancraig, if we play with a team full of young guys and reserves and get beat, then the site will be in meltdown today and tomorrow with alot of the guys saying play the youngsters up in arms and calling for Gordons head and all the usual lillian.

I dont come on here when we get beat as the negativity does my head in and that leaves me with nothing to do on my lunch hour, so strongest team and a win please Celtic so I can enjoy my chicken and cheese sarnie and read this site.

DBBIA :- Are you sure you and your box brownie were in Ayrshire when you took that pic?

O1bhoy :- We may be space cadetts but it could be worse, we could be one of those poor souls in the south at the border region who are wired to the moon. An exception is made for the Kilwinkie missionary as she battles to save DBBIA's morality and introduce him to such modern wonders as antibiotics. I'm sure he will find them more effective than the present use of potions and incantations which are still so prevalent there.

.

PS. OldTim67....

I Have already marked Your ScoreCard....

You Scored....21....Hmmmmm....

o1afanofOldTim67CSC

EHIY

Sachs is 78 !!!!

and what should he say; .. it never bothered me ? Mmmhhh I cant see that one going down to well with his grand daughter or family,

Yes I got so het up about it that I near suffered a heart attack .... that´s one for the lawyers to make up

Ignore it with the contempt it deserves. So that they can re-offend and commit crimes again?

Shouldn´t we be protecting the aged?

I tell you what if anybody was phoning my granny (never met my grandads) at 78 and leaving crap on her answer machine regarding one of their grand daughters. It would be me that would be fearing the long arm of the law

I think it's about time I commented on the game!

I'd like to see a few of the fringers get a game but not to the detriment of the result - which I suppose is like saying you want to have your cake and eat it. I'd go with something like:

Boruc

Hinkel, Caldwell, Loovens, Robson

Caddis, Donati, Hartley, McCourt

Sheridan, Hutchinson

Solid at the back and gives Hinkel more match fitness and Robson another game at full back under his belt. I'd then load the bench with first teamers just in case. But I'd take this lot to turn Killie over...

EHIY

.

EdwardUrsus....

Convert The Celtic Generation Quiz....To A Rankers Quiz....and Let Me Know Your Score....

o1bhoy

PS. If it's 21.... We All Will Know You 'ARE' OldTim67.... ;o))))

Edward Ursus

What do you think of the abuse James McCarthy received on saturday (not nearly as much last night I believe) ??

Also Are you worried, if the famine song continues, Rangers will be in serious bother and may eventually be deducted points??

EHIY,

I would fear about the severe lack of pace in that midfield

We´re not going to agree on anything today :-)

bazzabhoy

Is that real chicken or processed chicken? and what kind of Cheese? seems like a strange combination or are they separate sandwhich? Just curious, I'm a ham, tomato and lettuce with a touch of mustard or piccalilli man myself.

No preference to brown or white bread.

EarlofSandwich CSC

Can't believe all the sanctimonious garbage being spouted about Ross/Brand on this site. Its bad enough that this Daily Mail issue is being commented on by all & sundry in the media, & politicians who, in the current climate, one might have thought had a few more important matters to consider than some schoolboy humour spouted by a couple of comedians in a late night radio show 2 weeks ago that only generated 2 complaints when aired!

Please tell me that CQN is above being taken over by this right wing rag inspired nonsense?

EHIY
Dead right.
The "I demand an enquiry" brigade have bought the Daily Mail bait, hook, line and sinker. And as a result the grand-daughter with Max Clifford in tow has become the latest celeb non-entity by selling her story to The Sun.
If you find the pair funny, you find them funny. if you don't, you don't. Move on.
Did Gordon Brown comment on the Blue Peter cat naming fiasco? Now that one really annoyed me..

EHIY, that looks a pretty useful lineup on paper (but the game's played on grass - b'dumtish, thank you, I'll be here all week). I agree that it might be good to give the younger troops a run out, but Killie are no mugs, and I'm sure Greeting'face Jeffries will fancy his chances of a trophy as much as anyone, especially without Sammi to make his defence look stupid as he did last time we went down there.

oldtim67

as i have said before my seat is area 418.Lisbon lions upper.
i go in via turnstiles 59 to 61..

there is a lift if you are unable to get up the stairs.
Don't get tickets for the rearangers games though..

bone dry csc...

PS sorry about no show on saturday,like your style...:¬)

TNT,

just finished my 3 slices of toast (plain bread - mothers pride -including an outsider...hmmm) and corned beef. On the plus side I did use Flora light.
Just what a man of my wee frame needs :-)

HAIL! HAIL!
Token

Awe Naw

Are we now of the opinion that those in their 70s don't understand an attempt at comedy (in whatever guise it comes in)?

Like I said, I'm not psychic and I'm guessing neither are you. Just because he's an old boy now doesn't change the fact that he understands alternative comedy and realises that it can often go beyond the pale. He worked with Cleese for crying out loud - do you remember when Monty Python were all off to hell in a handcart for some of the stuff they came out with? Now they are rightly heralded as geniuses.

I'm not suggesting he found it funny - but I'm sure he's probably more embarrassed that his daughter's private life has been splashed all over the press than his own sense of hurt at the broadcast. And she only has herself to blame for that - it's not as if Brand isn't a well known Lothario!!!

EHIY

Woss is paid £6m a year?

Astonishing. And it would never happen it it weren't for the "unique way" the BBC is funded, i.e. coercion and threats.

End the licence fee and privatise the BBC now.

O1bhoy :- I get 18 I would have had 20 but can't think on any way to convert the clergy or bridge questions.

Roccobhoy :- My views on racist abuse are pretty well known, I'm against it.
On whether Rangers will be deducted points I honestly doubt it, if the song keeps being heard I can see action being taken but not point deduction as I think pragmatism will stop it before that point.
Where I think there may be a problem with Sat and last nights singing is that it names a specific player who could have played for Scotland but plays for the ROI. I think many Rangers fans or officials would claim the chant wasn't racist when aimed at him as he is Scottish and it's along the lines of the abuse MR Boyd will get for not playing for Scotland.
The above isn't my opinion but one that I do hear from others.

JohnnyClash

Cheers - I thought I was on a sure thing having a pop at the Whitehouse/Daily Mail brigade on a Celtic site - wasn't prepared for the backlash!

Awe Naw

On footy this time - I'd say the pace would come from Caddis who has it to burn - plus I can't think of too many speed merchants in the Killie midfield so I'd take my chances. Was just trying to find that balance between resting people like Brown and having a strong enough side to win. The first teamers on the bench would be there as a back up as I said.

Oneantonrogan

Cheers - I agree that the moaning JJ would love to turn us over and agree with all those that say we have to make sure we get through. As has been said already - if we don't win it, the FOD probably will - and I think even me and Awe Naw can agree we don't want that! ;-)

EHIY

Again I must repeat it’s naive and tribal minded to assume ALL those who boo McCarthy bigots. Many people are simply angry he shunned his own country and the fact it is Ireland is irrelevant. Most of the people I know fall into that category including me, my family and friends. If you don’t believe that you have a very limited experience of the breadth of Scottish opinion and think its all tims v huns. I wouldn’t be friends with a serious bigot but most of the non-OF fans I know would be inclined towards loudly criticising him for this and I can’t blame them one bit. Besides he is not a Celtic player so it’s not a Celtic issue. I don’t believe in the 'one of us' love-in based on religion or ancestry.

Going over old ground but after the abuse that Aiden McGeady and James McCarthy get in Scotland for declaring to play for Ireland, I'm really glad that Rangers don't have to play any games in Spain this season as I'm not sure Mr Novo could cope with the abuse he would receive for "turning his back on his country".

Hail Hail for Kaunas

Right winger/morale crusaders/handwringers...hmmmmm. Heard it all now. Those two clowns (not in a funny way) stepped over a line. If anyone found the transcript of those calls funny in the slightest I'd be worried about their sense of humour - or lack of.

The Jonathan Ross/Russell Brand thing (to me) prooves that Fawlty Towers is still more popular than they will ever be. Do not mess with Manuel!!!

Oh for some transfer gossip.

For what it's worth, i think games like this should see some youngsters playing - i.e. fringe players. O'Dea, Caddis, Sheridan, Hutchinson, Mizuno. Not all of them!

themanfromghordknowswhere

Do these friends of yours who loudly criticise James McCarthy (and no doubt Aiden too) also share the same contempt for Brian McLean?

The Token Tim

I use olivespread myself on my sarnie, it's the Latin Lover in me, I prefer olivespread made in Napoli, extra-virginal with a hint of danger.

Filippo Berio CSC

01bhoy

Great stuff. I'm definitely an Eldorado.....

I was at the Kilmarnock '78 game - Rugby Park replay. I'm sure Davie Provan and possibly Duffield were playing for Killie that night.

David Francey of the ruggedy R's......nobody ever took a shot at goal in his commentaries.....it was always a "Drrrrrrrrriiiive!!!"

A bit like Archie McWeetabix's "Let Flies".

And what about the Jungle songs from those days?

Hail Glorious St Patrick, Faith of Our Fathers, chanting "John Greig" when a dug ran on the park.....they fairly took your mind off the soggy cheese rolls at the bottom of the cardboard box.....

Nostalgia isnae what it used to be.....

Tully.

EHIY,

It wasn´t comedy as you rightly pointed out. It was an attempt at comedy. It was a failed attempt so they do not have a leg to stand on. Fawlty towers was comedy exceptionally good comedy. Therefore there are no grounds whatsoever for a comparison here imho. Lets not give it any more publicity it doesn´t deserve it.

IS the draw for the semis at Rugby park after tonights match

At least Deek would have been made welcome by night clubs in Burnley!!!

http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/topstories/Hibs-star-Derek-Riordan-knocked.4639069.jp

TNBT and TTT

I have just consumed a cheeky wee herb and onion ciabbata roll spread with vitalite and a suprisingly tasty wee pair of walls sausages that pop into the microwave in a wee plastic bag. I did of course have a dollop of HP Brown on the said sausages

Sometimes unusual combinations work

Aw_naw

It wasn't entirely failed as some people found it funny, see BBC interviewing several people going to a recording of Never Mind the Buzzcocks on the news last night for example. I'm guessing the average listener to Russell Brand's show likes the kind of thing Russell Brand does. However, Brand's humour is generally not mean-spirited, so I am inclined to think Jonathan Ross was the driving force this time. The fact that only two people who listened to the show thought to complain about it shows that it wasn't offensive to anyone who chose to listen to it before it was foisted on everyone as a matter of national importance.

I was looking forward to seeing David Attenborough on JR's TV show on Friday as well...

Paul67
Vmhan aw, playing fringe players works until you lose, then it feels like the worst idea.The winning habit is required

There is a reason why managers like Fergie & Wenger season in season out treat the league cup with the contempt in deserves. That is losing with fringe players is a helluva better than winning with the 1st team and losing the likes of caldwell / brown / mcgeady / maloney to injury at an absolute crucial point of the season.

2 huge games coming up, this is not one of them. Give people games who need them and lets have a look at some youngsters

EHIY.....I like the look o yir team.

It has a bit of experience (ex 1st picks) and the wannabees. A good enough mix to beat Killie whilst resting most of our regular 1st team.....I'd take the gamble and go for it.

eyeontheSPLCSC

vmhan aw

.

tully57 on October 29, 2008 1:41 PM....

I Think a Few 'EL' Bhoys are on Here....Hopefully....We Need the Wisdom....

o1bhoy

01Bhoy,

great post! I came along just at the very end of the "gies a lift mister" period, and only ever had to do it once, in my first game. I do remember quite clearly when the Celtic View was the highlight of the week - all 6 pages of it!

As for tonight, I wouldn't flood the team with youngsters. Here is my XI:

Boruc
Caddis, Caldwell, Loovens, Robson
McCourt, Hartley, Brown, McGeady
McDonald, Maloney

Subs: Goalie, O'Dea, Donati, Nakamura, Sheridan

By Iain Macfarlane

GORDON STRACHAN last night claimed EVERY top flight boss backs his view that the SPL’s Under-21 rule must be scrapped.

The Celtic manager believes the rule which dictates two players under the age of 21 must be included in an 18-man squad is bad for the game.

Paul Caddis and Darren O’Dea are just two of the talented kids to have suffered at Parkhead from a rule designed to give risng stars more given top-team experience.

In practice though, Strachan argues they learn nothing being stuck on the bench when they should be farmed out to play every week.

Earlier this month all 12 SPL bosses met at a manager’s forum and the view on the rule was unanimous. Now Strachan wants action.

He said: “It would be a smashing idea for us to let Paul go on loan to the likes of Gary McAllister at Leeds or to other friends in England.

“But we can’t let him go as we have to have under 21s on the bench.

“It was mentioned recently by all the coaches – we mention it every year.

“We’d all like to scrap the Under 21 rule – if you need them or they are good enough then you can still play them.

“We have guys who could be out learning their trade, but can’t.

“You think back to the likes of David Beckham who learned going out from Manchester United to Preston.

Just saw Russell Brand being interviewed today

He looked terrible - obviously a sleepless night - unshaven and his hair like a burst matress, while wearing clothes that looked as if he hadnt changed in weeks.........

"It would be foolish for me to say anything without thinking. That is what caused the problem in the first place"

He then went on to publicly apologise to Andrew Sachs before acknowledging Hari Krishna

Modern comedy is rubbish

DBBIA/PhilSilversCSC

blantyretim.

I think I'll put up with the wet conditions,the thought of being seated next to some ne'r do wells,that would be worse than any ammount of rain that fell on me.

We actually went to BBs,The 5 a sides would have been fine with better weather,but Saturday wasn't for me,spent about 15mins at the 5s then went on to BBs.

Henriks

Never judge a comedy performance on the page. Even the funniest jokes will seem dry in a transcript rather than see a stand up perform them live.

Comedy is one of those things that divides public opinion more than most. What one person finds hilarious someone else will be shocked and appalled by. Does that mean we ban all alternative comedy? Who decides what is offensive? The red tops? The Daily Mail? You or I?

As has been noted this was a late night show and generated 2 complaints over swearing, not content.

My concerns aren't over this piece specifically, but more the bigger picture of hysteria created over a comedy performance.

If you don't like something don't listen to it, watch it or pay to see it.

EHIY

Jinkys - Brand always looks like that !

Vmhan Aw

Cheers - that's what I was going for - and a bit of physicality up front in Sheridan and Big Ben.

We're going to need these bhoys over the next few weeks so let's get them in the mix now and then it won't be so daunting when the more important stuff comes round...

EHIY

The Narrowbhoat Tim - 6 or 7 slices of chicken breast(sliced thin) then pour over some honey and mustard salad dressing, add some lettuce, onion, pepper and sweetcorn, a wee bit of mayo then grate some cheese, then a dash more honey and mustard dressing. encompased in wholegrain bread. nomnomnom.

Henriks

I think that was an attempt at comedy! Sort of illustrates my point above.

I found it funny, Jinksboy :-)

EHIY

Jinkysboy even - sorry!

EHIY

EHIY - Should we call TFS comedy then ? The blue hordes obviously think its funny. Are we being too Mary Whitehouse by complaining about that ?

I don't watch or listen to Brand as a rule anyway - never liked the guy. Reminds me of the childcatcher in chitty chitty bang bang, however the story is in the mainstream media now. Last I checked anything in the mainstream media was there to be commented on.

We can agree to disagree. You find a phone call to someone regarding his grandaughters sex life as funny, I don't.

Who decides what is offensive ? I do as far as I'm concerned :-)

Re Ross and Brand:The cynic in me says there will be one loser...bbc producer, and one winner...Sach's granddaughter. The boys will not be sacked. Storm in a tea cup...the shameless ones are the hypocritical MPs.

Please everyone - just stop it okay? Its a non-story. So they made a ill judged phone call - big woweee. Focus people.

DailyMailCSC

EHIY - I was taking your advice and not judging Jinkysboys comedy on the page....;-)

EHIY

I laughed as I read your comment " Never judge a comedy performance on the page. Even the funniest jokes will seem dry in a transcript rather than see a stand up perform them live."

next post - henriks " Brand always looks like that !"

Timing is everything in this business

EHIY,

Andrew Sachs and Georgina Baillie and family have just to accept this very public humiliation and defamation of character, as well as intrusion of privacy while a possible crime is being committed in the name of poor alternative comedy ?

What the opinions are of; you , me, every single license payer, hack , editor, program controller is absolutely irrelevant as the police will tell you about any crank caller.

What does matter is the opinions of those that had their privacy invaded, are those the two that complained? Unfortunately both of those did not have the option of not listening to it and I think you will find that both of them have probably already paid their bit to be humiliated and defamed nationally.

oldtim67

what did you call me? a ne'r do well...im shocked and astounded of forehead.... ;((((

have a miserable cold so used some bells for my toadies last night,wouldn't want to use the good stuff...

my team
boruc
hinkel, loovens,caldwell,robson
caddis,hartley,brown,mcgeady
sheridan, maloney

Russel Brand Jonathan Ross and Chicken Recipes???

Is this a football blog or the womens institute???

If we're talking off football Bloemfontain Celtic strip perfect design a new away kit black and green hoops!

DD

EST le dessiner pour le demi au parc de Rugby après les ce soir égale

The League cup, aaarrrgghhh.
Just when I thought the memories had gone away.
It was a cold, wet, miserable, Winter's night.
My first time crossing the beautiful Clyde, heading south, to the uncharted land of the Hun.
Before the battle, we adjourned to the Stanley bar for a couple of pints.
What a tiny oasis of warmth and friendliness in the valley of darkness.
The locals informed us of an attack by a horde of Chelsea fans, led by huns, on the bar the previous summer (they were playing their brothers in a pre-season friendly).
These "heroes" beat up the patrons and wrecked the mirrors and fixtures in the bar, singing and chanting their bile as they went about their work.
On entering the stadium of hatred, I was amazed to see "Loyalist pies", "Bluenose burgers" ect... on sale.
Taking my seat, which are squeezed so tightly together there's no way Gaza or Fat Ally could have sat on them, I gazed around the Cauldron of Sectarianism.
And so the nightmare began...
Raith Rovers; the pride of Kirkcaldy.
The visions are returning...
No trophy for years...
The Huns winning the league year in year out...
Here was our chance to lift a trophy, any trophy.
But no.
After throwing away the lead in the dying minutes, the drama ends with my Hero, Paul McStay, missing the penalty that had the locals, dancing in the streets of Raith and our lot trooping dejectedly back to the land of the Fenians.
Never had I felt so down after a sporting event.
Cold, wet and broken.
That is my abiding memory of the League cup, even though I was back for the 3-0 defeat of Dundee Utd.
Give the young lads/fringe players a run, feck it, tis the League we want.

O1bhoy,

couple of things you forgot.

The sight of wee boys - usually about 11 stanging on beer cans to get a better view.

Almost every game the sight of 10 white hankies being furiously waved then a gap would appear in the crowd to the sight of a person being removed on a stretcher - you would then look at your Dad's reaction to see how serious it was - usually the sight of blood would result in the "Ach it's only a drunk" comment or a very somber face if he thought it more serious.

The sight of 125 under 12 year olds running onto the pitch after we scored a goal. Dida would have hated them.

The sight of a board above the stand entrances - Front Stand £2 Main stand £3. These were taken down at about 2.30 most weeks and replaced by a stand full sign.

The sight of a really tough looking gang roaming the Celtic end suouting "Young Nunny". don't know who they were but they scared the hell out of me.

On leaving the ground a guy selling the times and citizen with first half reports on the games - how useless was that ?

I don't remember any of the - I just got them from my big brother.

Seville.67

Agree Paul, you can't have enough trophies in the cabinet!

It would be nice to go for the treble this year as our friends in blue were "oh so close" to the big quadruple last year! :)))

gsu

even better heres an idea for a summer tournament

why don't we invite all the Celtics Bloemfontain, Donegal Celtic, Farsley, Stalbridge as well as other green teams like sporting lsibon and panathanaikos??

DD

What time's the KO the day?, you ghuys just put the clock back last weekend(is that correct)and we're on George W time.

gsu

DonegalDanny- is it black or navy blue?

Real Betis were supposed to be holding a tournament for all the 'greenandwhite' teams to mark their centenary but I don't know if it ever got off the ground.

01bhoy.

Your marking for me is I think spot on,but the Eldorado Generation wasn't me,1/2 bottle of whisky and a case of beer was my carry oot,it was a bit of a struggle with the carry oot and lifting a laddie over the turnstyles in those days.

No,I didn't drink all the beer.

You don`t need a air baloon to know which way the wind blows.

Guardian 28Oct.

The goverbnment has extended it`s powers to tackle violent extremism and incitement to religious and racial hatred.

Jacqui Smith will strenghten the rules on excluding from Britain those who are suspected of stirring up tensions and will cover Anti-abortionists,animal right extremists,neo-Nazis as well as extremists clerics.

A spokesman said unless an idividual could persuade the authorities that they werre no longer involved in preaching hate,they would face a permanent ban.He said an iddividual who claimed to show that they had repudiatedprevious extremist views or actions would have to publicly retract them.

HUAC CSC

dontbrattbakk

Pretty certain its black but is really smart, thinking of making a purchase I must admit.

I think it would be a great idea to get these teams together for a tuornament as we (maybe apart from Lisbon??) share a partly Irish or certainly Celtic history. We could get Fuerth and St Pauli involved too!

DD

Henriks / Jinkysboy

That's all just given me too much of a laugh to bother the debate! I just like a good discussion and will argue the toss for long enough if I think I've a valid point - whether it's my personal opinion or not. You might say I'm a bit of a mischief maker...

For the record I wouldn't put alternative comedy in the same boat as the racist behaviour of the FOD. It's not really comparing apples with apples. One is a group of people that think they're funny and can pretty much get away with whatever they say as they feel they will be protected by the media...and the others are comedians....

EHIY

GSU, the match kicks off in 5 and a quarter hours, whatever that is from where you are.

madra rua, thanks for picking off that scab :-( I was living in England at the time without the benefit of the internet, satellite telly or digital radio - had to watch the damn thing via Teletext! Still, we did give Raith their biggest thrill ever - that half-time scoreboard at the Olympic Stadium in Munich when they were beating Bayern 1-0. All this talk of Mickey Mouse cups - you used to be able to qualify for Europe through this thing.

MentalScars CSC

Never could understand why there was so much fighting at the back of the Celtic end all through the 80's. I've no idea if it continued in to the 90's as the new arrivals started to "eat" their way though their inheritance as soon as they could !!!

Heard on more than one occasion that it was Aberdeen (insert team of choice here) casuals but this was never proven beyond any doubt to me. WTF was that all about ???

pablophanque

EHIY

Mischief making is an art form in itself.

Light the blue touch paper and stand well back.

I always remember the Fawlty Towers episode when Basil was asking Manuel if he had seen the pigeons. Classic

BTW - TFOD arent comedians - they are the peepil

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend.. DontBrat @ 1.58.

I agree,pal.

What you guys are getting a jugful of, is known in the Trade as.. Shock..statements.

It is nevah funny, it is complete disrespect for propriety...it is childish, it is crass.. it is all of these things..

It is based in appealing to the primal instincts of all the bad little boys of the woild.

A protest against society, by the Have Nots...

and as you know, there are lots of those losers, everywhere.

And they are simply Aching, to get their own back on a society, where they a failing to make the grade.

Howevahhhhhhhhhh..

Here in the U.S. this type of unpleasantness,pays very well...Mancow..probably was the original.. in finding popularity by shattering the mores of common decency..followed very closely, by Howard Stern..whom I know, well.

As I said, this type of shocking stuff pays more than rather, well... Howard, signed a contract for 400 Million Pounds of Tapioca... Nice sound to that~

It is only natural that this type of shocking behaviour should eventually, reach your shores..

I am afraid it will get woise.

There is Money in it.. and it is a very easy way to perform.. It always is much, much, easier,to appeal to the baser instincts.
Therefore it is a fertile field in which untalented performers can pile their offal.

For there is no cleverness required ,in performing this type of act..

Human Beings, always have trouble in containing their prurient thoughts...
Everybody who is anybody, knows that an off color story, will always play well.. except in Peoria,of course.~

Get used to it,guys.. Pandora has moved to jolly old England.. to pastures anew.

Let's face it..there is a quickening breakdown in moral values...everywhere.

They tell me that over in your country...

It is the Exception, if a couple has taken the trouble to tie the knot..legally.

Kipping up .. is the way to go..

Tell me if I am wrong, but that is what I hear.

Kojo.
yer pal...who likes ye.

pablaphanque,

it was the young nunny

Seville.67

Madra @ 2.14,

why, o why, o why, did you have to bring that game up???
It took me about 10 yrs to blank that game out!

I will never forget sitting in the west enclosure that day with Gordon Dalziel running towards us giving it big licks after his goal. The memory of a lonely completely dejected Paul McStay was hard to bear. God knows how he felt that day, coz I know how bad I was feeling!

The following week I was over in the palace in hamilton with a few of my mates when who did we see walking towards us with his head bent over and hand clutching his lower back, but that same Gordon Dalziel. As he came over one of my mates asked him what was up, to which he replied "och nothing its just the weight of this Coca-Cola Cup winners medal weighing me doon!" I have never wanted to punch someone and then jump up and down on their head repeatedly as much as I did at that moment.

Arrrrrggggghhhhh!

Thank God for the Noughties!

HAIL! HAIL!
Token

PS - I should mention that Dalziel drank in Jack Daniels in Motherwell at that time, which was also our boozer then, as our supporters bus left from there and that we knew him. He didn't just try that stunt at random.

OAR, Cheers

gsu
mighthavetoduckoutearlyfromworkCSC

blantyretim.

my favourite cold remedy is,[In a big glass] add 4 measures of whisky,a tablespoon of honey,1 spoonful of sugar,and a lemsip,stir well and drink,then straight to bed.

This is even beginning to creep me out, so I've no idea what it's doing to you oar !!!???

But the word of the day is..................................

b'dumtish !!!! That's gotta be right up there with anything my good friend DBBIA has produced over the last week or so :o)))

I'll be thinking about that for ages. Could only have been bettered if your line after had included "try the scampi"

pablophanque

.

OldTim67....

It's Prwobabwly a Lanarkshire V Glesga ....Thang....

o1bhoy

Think it's pretty obvious how low the league cup lies in the esteem of most Celtic fans when more than 50 per cent of today's posts centre around Brand and Ross!

I promise not to comment again on this, but it'll be a parky day in Hades before I ever find myself in alignment with the Daily Mail!

Kojo, don't think you're comparing like with like. Brand and Ross aren't shock jocks as their program isn't a phone-in and there humour, while ribald, is a Grand Canyon sized gulf away from Howard Stern.

Remember, if it BENDS... it's funny, if it BREAKS... it's not funny!

OldTim- skip the sugar and Lemsip[ too expensive for what you get] and substitute either orange or lemon juice. The honey is probably the best treatment for coughs and colds you can use.

The mark-up on over-the-counter medicines eg Lucozade, must be several gazillion percent.

Jinkysboy

Now that I know it's an art form I'll consider myself to have no other option but to share it with the public more often!

As for Fawlty Towers - pure genius - as funny today as it was (I imagine!) when it was first aired. IMHO the only thing that has come close since is The Office of which I am a massive fan. I have all of both FT and TO on DVD and despite seeing them all more times than I could possibly guess at, the comedy seems to get funnier rather than diminish. And that's some achievement...

EHIY

Sorry about that memory from the vault, just to say, when Paul missed the penalty , he went down on his knees and covered his face in his hands.
When he lifted his head again, he was staring up at the big screen, which was showing the replay of his penalty !!!!!!!
Aaaaarrrgghhhh.

EHIY - The Office - so we do agree on some comedy ! Great series. As was Alan Partridge !

Madra Rua - I was behind the goal that night. Scarred me for life. Paul must have thought he had dropped through to hell when he looked up to relive that miss.

Still a legend in my eyes.

EHIY

A talent should be nurtured and shared !!! Its yer duty man.

My all time favourite funny is Blazing Saddles. Brilliant.

And I laugh my head off still at Tommy Cooper clips.

Of the modern comedy shows I actually think the Simpsons is both clever and funny and of course the big yin is still the most hilarious stand up around IMHO.

Despite his critics I really appreciate that other wee scottish guys one liners - WGS. He has his moments.

up_over_goal

"a parky day in Hades" - class! :-)

pablo

I have to agree, well played OAR - b'dumtish - pure quality. Phonetically it's perfect!

I'll also add that one of the things I truly love about CQN is that we can stumble off down these other random paths of debate, whilst never forgetting we are all here for Celtic reasons. Hats off to Paul67 once again for providing the platform!

EHIY

henrik's

I couldn't agree more.
I have met him twice and on both occasions he was a gentleman and couldn't have been nicer.

The Maestro - a true Celtic great IMHO!

HAIL! HAIL!
Token

Henriks

You see? We're not so different! Partridge is brilliant too - I could quote lines from both that and the Office til the cows come home (from where I often wonder?). But I won't, since this is a footy site at the end of the day (thought I'd throw that cliche in to re-establish my fitba credentials).

EHIY

Desert Island Chefs on STV right now is a Celtic supporting chef on Orkney - opening shots of him playing keepy uppie in the hoops with YNWA on the back.

The Bath Test

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director how they determined whether or not a patient needed to be institutionalized.

'Well,' said the Director, 'we fill up a bath with cold water, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bath.'

'Oh, I understand,' said the visitor. 'A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup.'

'No.' said the Director, 'A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?'

BringbackWossyCSC

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear, friend..up_over_goal.

I admit I have nevah heard the program..

Howevahhhhhhh..from what I have read of the unwarranted and vile attack on Mr.Sachs..and his Grand Daughter.

It has all the earmarks of a Shocking attack on an innocent Party.

That to me, is the same old same old stuff.. that Howard has been pulling for years..

Whether they run a Phone- In show.. or no..is immaterial.

It it walks like a duck and talks like a duck...

It is still the same ole Canard~

Na Pal.. I disagree with the criteria, that you have presented,in this case.

I am afraid,pal.. the you and eye will nevah see eye to eye on this wan.

Kojo.
yer pal..who likes tae like ye.

Hi bhoyz n ghirlz,

Quick question... can anyone paying thier Season Ticket by direct debit tell me when the final installment is supposed to come off?

Thanks,

Freebirdsfly

Freebirdsfly - I think it was today.

Actually - I think its Friday. I got an Outlook reminder today, but I set that to appear early.

Jinkysboy

I remember my Dad showing me Blazing Saddles when all I really appreciated about it was the campfire scene! But I've seen it a number of times down the years. An excellent movie, which has both subtle and slapstick comedy. Hard hitting and tackled issues of racism in a subversive way too.

Tommy Cooper style one liners are still the standard to aim at for any gag based stand up.

The Simpsons I really enjoy but can't watch too many too regularly for some reason. But if I give them a break and come back to an episode I never fail to find at least one laugh out loud moment. The thing I love about the Simpsons is the fact it's so adult orientated but kids can get something out of it too. If you like that try Family Guy if you haven't already - like the Simpsons but more near the knuckle and both silly and happy to pass social comment.

EHIY

tvcriticcsc

Many years ago I had the pleasure of sharing a few sociable drinks with the Maestro, a more gentle person you couldn't hope to meet.
That evening, I danced with his beautiful wife Anne-Marie, at a Celtic function.
An occasion to be treasured.

Henriks Sombrero,

Thanks. I thought so too... but it doesn't appear to have come off yet.

DBBIA.

Your right about the honey,it seems to ease the soreness in the throat,But I thought the lemsip helped me sweat out the cold.

Has anyone heard a rumour that Celtic are playing tonight? Or have all games been cancelled because of Ross/Brandgate ;-)

Somebody mentioned ducks

Awe Naw :-)

Try this for size...

A man charges into a bank wearing a balaclava and wielding a handgun. He shouts, 'This is a raid. Everyone, get on the floor!!', and proceeds to empty the cash drawers.

As he runs towards the door with the loot, a brave customer yanks off his balaclava. The robber immediately shoots the customer in the head and shouts, 'Did anybody else here see my face?' The robber notices another customer peering from behind a counter and goes over and shoots him in the head also. 'Did anybody else see my face?' he shouts again, waving his gun around. There is silence for a few seconds before a male voice is heard from a
distant corner...

'I think my missus caught a glimpse....'

EHIY

shootingpeopleintheheadhasgottobeinbadtastecsc

penang_bhoy

The game is off. Instead the BBC will be showing the said "comedians" receiving an old-fashioned stoning, followed by the traditional hanging.

Extra-time will be necessary if either is to be drawn and quartered.

EHIY

There was a gradual change in the Simpsons - it was about Bart and for the kids then through time as Homer became the focus it became more adult. Probably kept its original fans as they grew up - so did the comedy

How many times I have said "Homer is me" and " I used to be Bart"

As said on here last week - the PC brigade would bomb out Blazing Saddles now.

We used to sing funny songs at CP in the old days - ones that made us smile - usually a dig at the other team. Trying to think of some chants but struggling

Anyone remember any funny songs !!!!!!!!!!!!!

jinkysboy

I remember plenty of funny songs but I don't think our host would appreciate me putting any up here.

Henriks Sombrero,

I hope you're right.

Friday is payday for me. If it comes off before then I'll be facing a 30 quid bank charge. So fingers crossed!

Thanks again.

watch out for chic dung rolling up his trouser leg on the news tonight. Suppose he'll take the apron off first.

Wasn't going to comment on the Woss Brand Gate scandal but seeing as we've been asked not to thought it only polite,

Henrik got it right earlier, there attempt at comedy was about as funny as the famine song,

Plus the two of them are an obnoxious pair of gits,

Hang em High.

Madra@2:14
In common with many others on here you have re-opened some wounds associated with that Final.
A couple of points I still feel annoyed about to this day firstly Paul McStay is forever quoted as the person who lost us the Cup,partially correct, but lost in the passage of time is the useless lump Gordon Marshall who failed to control a shot in the dying minutes allowing an equaliser and extra time.
This is the same man,despite years playing with us who also appeared in other forgettable events,2003 Killie at Rugby Park his time wasting was a disgrace,we lose the League by a goal,then there is the last day loss at M'Well,yes he was in goal.
A man I never liked when he played for us but to be so "anti " having left us astonished me.
Last point for the historians,we may have felt bad how do you think the late Cardinal Winning felt as his once in a lifetime event was ruined by the football,it should't have but I'm sure we all have had events clouded by a bad result.
Onward to Rugby park.

Jinkysboy

Good point on the audience growing up with the show. But it's certainly better for that evolution.

Anyone in the PC brigade that would have a go at Blazing Saddles simply hasn't got a clue. Mel Brooks was doing what all truly great comedians and comedy writers do - holding society's faults up to a mirror and mocking them by making them look ridiculous. Much like he did with the Producers too.

Comedy is a brilliant outlet for this type of challenge to various social ills that blight us. Long may it continue to be so!

EHIY

Mort

What happens if it goes to penalties?

EHIY,

one back at you

A Vicar checks in to a Hotel,

he says to the Receptionist

"I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled"

Receptionist replies

"No, it's a normal porn channel you sick b******"

weebobby

aren't their trouser legs not already rolled - at least one?

stud marks?

stretchered off for stud marks?

wooooos

can Russell Brand play left back?

Jonathon Ross gets almost as much from the EBC every year as Celtic get from the Champions League.

Celtic provide entertainment and joy to millions.

Jonathon Ross pleases himself.

Awe Naw

I'm sure I posted that last one a week or so back! Not content with berating my position on WossBwandgate (as Swalex might call it - where is WG with the next instalment of TGITW during all this comedy debate anyway?!?) are you now nicking my gags?!?

I'll go with this one:

A man and wife were celebrating their 50-year anniversary, so the man bought his wife a £150 see-through nightgown.
Later that night she was getting ready for bed and realized the nightgown was still in the box downstairs. Walking naked through the house, she passed her husband who said, "My word, for £150 they could've at least ironed it!"

EHIY

penang bhoy

Penalties could be this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djYKHpEbKBg

JohnnyClash

Not sure - I've heard his best position is in the hole.

Thanks Jinkysboy (I think- I can't get youtube on my pc here). I look forward to viewing later at half time in the gap between the stoning & the hanging!

Jinkysboy

Your plea for funny songs was always going to be difficult to achieve with this being a family friendly site, but a particular favourite was the "2 Andy Gorams" chant - comedy gold whoever came up with that...

EHIY

It was autumn, and the Indians on the remote reservation asked their new Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.

Since he was an Indian Chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets and, when he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the hell the weather was going to be.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared.

Being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"

"It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed," the Meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood in order to be prepared.

One week later he called the National Weather Service again. "Is it going to be a very cold winter?" he asked.

"Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."

The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.

Two weeks later he called the National Weather Service again. "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"

"Absolutely," the man replied. "It looks like it's going to be one of the coldest winters ever."

"How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked.

The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy".

awe_naw, EHIY et al,

Thanks for the jokes, some very good ones posted. Here's one of my favourites:

What do you call someone who can't tell the difference between a spoon and a ladle?

Obese

Vmhan aw, agree, the league is more important, but think of the change in sentiment following a defeat.

Oldtim67, :-)

Narrowbhoat, “trebles”, a fine idea.

Mr.Green, injury is a concern, especially when we are so afflicted, but going into a game prepared to accept defeat if a weak team is fielded, is not something that will win you support after the event.

Vmhan aw are you still around?

Sean Connery was interviewed by politely by Johnathon Ross ;-), and bragged that despite being 72 years of age,
he could still have $ex 3 times a night.

Cilla Black, who was also a guest, looked intrigued.

After the show, Cilla says,'Sean, if I'm not bein too forward, I'd luv to 'ave $ex with yer. Lets go back to my 'ouse, we could 'ave a lorra fun.'

So they went back to her place and got comfortable.

After a couple of drinks they went off to bed, and had an hour of mad passionate 5ex together.

Afterwards, Sean says, 'If you think that wash good, let me shleep for half an hour, and we can have better shex. But while I'm shleeping, hold my ballsh in your left hand and ma willie in your right hand will ye dear'.

Cilla looks a bit perplexed, but says 'Okay'.

He sleeps for half an hour, awakens, and they have even better sex than before.
Then Sean says, 'Shilla, that wash wonderful. But if you let me shleep for an hour, we can have the besht shex yet. You'll have to.......'
'I know Sean. Yer want me to 'old onto yer bat 'n balls again. No problem hun'.

Cilla complies with the routine.

The results this time are absolutely mind blowing.

Once it's all over, they have a drink, Sean lights a cigarette and Cilla asks.....
'Sean, tell me, dis 'oldin yer balls in one hand and yer willie in de other - does it really stimulate yer that much?'
Sean replies, 'No, not at all Shilla, but the last time I shlept with a shcouser, the bitch shtole ma wallet.'

I just noticed that even Cilla calls him a hun !!!

Mort

Best yet! :-)

EHIY

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend.. Awe Naw

Like I just said...

People have trouble in containing their fascination with prurience.

You have just vindicated that statement, in spades...

Take the smarmy stuff out.. of that joke?? and whadya really got.?

Nuffin,pal..Nuffin.

Time to rope in the sleaze,pal

Kids read this stuff, ye know.

Kojo.
yer pal..who likes ye.

A man walked into a bar near Lexington, KY and ordered a beer just as former President Clinton appeared on the television. After a few sips, he looked up at the television and mumbled, "Now, there's the biggest horse's ass I've ever seen."

A customer at the end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and decked him.

A few minutes later, as the man was finishing his beer, Hillary Clinton appeared on the television. "She's a horse's ass too," the man said. This time, a customer at the other end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him and knocked him flat.

The man said, climbing back up to the bar, "This must be Clinton country!"

"Nope," the bartender replied, "you're in HORSE country."

Awe_Naw

:-)

raveheart.....back on now, had to do a bit lol

Paul67.....debate is good and at least we all want the same thing a Celts win...I'll await the team to see which way wee Ghord goes, if it's the way I'm advocating and we lose I won't be to bothered personally. If the big guns come out and we win or lose it'll be the effect on the team at the weekend I'll be bothered about, it all comes down to personal preference I suppose.

c'mon the hoops

vmhan aw

Kojo,

yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnn........................

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...................

haven´t we had this utterly boring conversation a hundred times?

It was my boy that told me it. Thank god he has an open mind. I cherish it

Paul67 will be along in a minute and will delete it be rest assured.

pettymoralsCSC

A teaser.

Your driving your car at a constant speed, on your right is a sheer drop, on your left is a fire engine travelling at the same speed as you, in front of you is a horse as big as your car also travelling at the same speed as you and behind you is a helicopter flying low level at the same speed as you.

What do you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation ??

canamalar,

wake up, go to the toilet and then drink copious amounts of orange juice while avoiding light and listening to Pink Floyd ?

Some were talking about the simpsons earlier and I was reminded about this funny line:

"See ya in court, Simpson. Oh, and bring that evidence with ya; otherwise, I got no case and you'll go scott-free." - Police Chief Wiggum

Get off the merry go round

Mort

I think the evidence was the auto dialler

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend.. Awe Naw,

Thanks pal.

We have a good thing going here...why try to spoil it?

This blog has a rep. to keep up.

It is not my intention to allow the high standard of family entertainment that it provides, to falter.

It would only take a very thin wedge to topple the Tower Of Pisa.

Kojo.
yer pal......who likes ye.

Awe_Naw..
close but no cigar, the answer is of course -

wait for it, wait for it

Get of the kiddies merry go round you drunken fool. bo boom

jinkys

it was indeed, it was on a couple of weeks ago. Classic show.

Raveheart35,
you named that tune in 1

My favorite line from the simpsons is Homer telling Marge "I wont lie to you Marge" as he disappears out the door without another word.

Vmhan I'm begining to doubt the existance of Mr Broggi.

Kojo,

Some of the stuff that you come out with especially your political views upsets my child visibly , yet I dont pass comment on it. I suggest you try and bully someone else. You should realise by now that it really doesn´t wash with me. Paul67 will delete it soon and we can all be pure and clean once more.

I put up with your filthy political views and you can put up with my school boy humour

Awe Naw yer pal who always likes

Brand n Ross....that all I want to say on the matter (on this site)....it's already too much IMO.

C'mon the hoops tonight and forever and ever......

vmhan aw

sex changes obviously after marriage, suddenly your in bed with a relative. :oD

raveheart.....I'm with you as he took £36 off me on Sat. for a jacket lol

trust me please yir on the bus for the man u game.

He keeps saying he'll ring you, what can you do, c'mon Steve are ye lurkin, if ye are .....get some work done, and PHONE!

vmhan aw

Just read the Brand/Ross `phone messages. Reads like the kind of stuff I would expect from adolescents and I suspect the `outrage` is as much to do with a dislike of the pair, the age of Sachs and a sympathy with the character for whom he is best known.

I would like to see a victory tonight. Whether we manage that with young bloods or old hands I don`t mind.

Hinkel targets silverware for celts

By David Friel

ANDREAS HINKEL admits he was stunned to learn that the Co-operative League Cup even existed but it won’t stop the German going all out to get his hands on the trophy.

In the days when European and international commitments are becoming increasingly demanding, Scotland is one of the few nations to still put up two domestic cups every season.

For Celtic full-back Hinkel, who previously played for Stuttgart and Sevilla, this came as a surprise, yet he stressed that it doesn’t lessen the importance of the tournament for him.

“It’s strange for me that there are two cup competitions in Scotland,” said Hinkel, as he previewed Wednesday’s quarter-final with Kilmarnock at Rugby Park. “In most countries, there is only one national cup competition.

“It was that way in Spain and Germany, so it’s strange for me. It means you have more games but I believe we can handle that with our squad.

“Every cup is important. In Germany, the national cup is a big competition and it was the same in Spain. We want to do well in this tournament.”

After a spell on the sidelines through injury, Hinkel returned to the Hoops starting XI against Hibernian on Saturday and produced a strong performance at right-back.

With Gordon Strachan choosing to use his entire squad to cope with a busy run of fixtures, Hinkel and his defensive colleagues have all played their fair share of games and the German is backing his manager’s rotation policy.

He said: “I’m used to rotation. At Sevilla, we had the same system because we had a good squad. I think it’s possible for that to happen at Celtic and it can be good for the players.

“It’s not just physically, it’s mentally as well. When you are playing every three days, it can sometimes be difficult and the manager is using the squad.

“We are playing well just now. We have trained well and we are all motivated for the Kilmarnock match. There are a lot of games just now, but we just have to be professional and concentrate.

“You have to handle the pressure that comes with playing so much. If you have a bad game, you have to clear your mind and move on. That’s crucial to be a top professional.”

Favourite ever Simpsons episode was on again the other week. It is the one where Homer really likes this bloke until he realises he's gay. Then he's terrified of Bart turning gay so makes loads of attempts to keep him straight - which leads to more and more stupid scenarios (including the genius steel works scene!) culminating in Moe and Barney deciding a hunting trip is the only way to 'fix' Bart. It's not deer season and they decide to shoot some reindeers in pens - only for them to turn on the hunters, leaving the gay guy and Marge to arrive in the nick of time to save the day.

Typical exchange during Homer's worries:

Homer: Marge, the boy was wearing a Hawaiian shirt!
Marge: So?
Homer: There's only two kinds of guys that wear those shirts, gay guys and big fat party animals. And Bart doesn't look like a big fat party animal to me

Classic!

EHIY

Jinkysboy 12:28

Regarding your "little dongle" for your laptop.

Can you elaborate further for me please. Is this a mobile broadband dongle or something else that lets you pick up freeview?

Cheers.

raveheart....

I've emailed him AGAIN, here's hoping!

I'm off now........ as Homer would say to Marge shortly after eating the contents of the fridge lol

vmhan aw soon to be vmhan c'monthehoopscsc

Homer drives in to a Deer..............

Homer : - D'oh !!

Marge : - A Deer !!!

Lisa : - A female Deer !!!!

Only bettered by Homer tripping out of his mind on Super Hot Chillies.

But the real funnies are in The Family Guy, no question. Stewie is the funniest character on the TV. Can't even watch the Simpsons now as I don't find it funny at all.

pablophanque

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend... Awe Naw.

Well...

I cannot for the life of me..equate anything that you have mentioned that distresses you regarding my shortcomings.. with..the unseemly act of submitting smutty jokes,as you are doing,pal.

Please explain.. it will be interesting how you manage to justify your claims.

As regards my Political affilliations,pal...

I have none.

I am entireley .. Apolitical.

I detest Politicians and Political Parties..the whole gamut..

Starting with ...Maggie...and right on down To Mr. Bush..

I detest... Communism, Fascism, Socialism, lets see?.. is that them awe?

I have only scorn for Political Systems...

What I do have admiration for..

Is Self Interest...

I am a big believer of Self Interest and also Standing on one's own two feet..and am a big Dis Believer in...

Robbing A to fund B..in order to curry favour with the have nots.

Now,if those things what I support as I have noted above, are what distresses you so...and which you regard as "filth"

Well, I am afraid that I just cannot see your point,in that pal.

Kojo.
yer pal..who likes ye.

DundeePerth, this is the one I've got...............

Freeview

Reception is a bit dodgy at times so check the availability in your area, as the add goes :o))

pablophanque

DundeePerth

Its a DVB-T stick - plugs into the USB port and gives me all the free digital tv stations as well as allowing pause and timeshift and the recording of said stations onto my hard drive. gets teletext on the PC too.

Mrs jinx got me it on one of those shopping channels (where the presenters are funnier than Russell Grant) for about £20

Russell Brand AND Russell Grant obviously

If only ah'd stuck in at French, ah could've had this !!!

"Description:
Working within the wave power systems engineering group, this role will involve supporting the development of simulation methods for the evaluation of wave power systems in the earlier stages of the technology development process. The candidate must demonstrate an ability and desire to engage in complex analytical tasks, using appropriate mathematical methods with the support of computational tools such as MathCAD and MATLAB/Simulink. Previous knowledge and experience with the analysis of mechanical and/or electrical hardware is a distinct advantage. PhD is advantageous, but not essential. Our client will also consider supporting those nearing completion of doctoral studies and willing to continue as an industrial PhD. Industrial experience, particularly in working with system integration and/or development engineering of complex mechanical systems is also an advantage. The candidate should be willing to travel within Europe for periods of up to 2 weeks at a time in order to attend training events. Fluent oral and written English skills are essential and additional European language skills are an advantage."

pablophanque

Kojo, unless you are from an industrial heartland (which I turned into an industrial wasteland, naturally),I can think of nothing I have done to earn your disdain. Howevvah (like it?). Be warned! I have now added your name to my not so little black book (I find I have to write things down these days).

Maggie

It was a rubbish joke anyway, not funny in the slightest, but not sure that in this day and age it was offensive either, what really intruiges me is that you can blatantly insult the guy and when he replies still signs off saying he likes ye, is that weird or what.

Kojo,

That´s succinct to the point and I entirely concur.You obviously need to try much harder. Try looking more inwardly rather than outwardly and then maybe it willcome to you

It distresses (maybe too strong an adjective) my bhoy not me. I explain to him the full picture and naturally it makes him feel better. I have warned him about going into politics as a way of countering ultra right wing tendencies.

So start looking inwardly rather than outwardly and get off yer petty moral high horse and engage in the real cosmopolitan modern world. Your not so clean yerself pal so stop kiddin yersel on.

Awe Naw

Yer pal who eywiz likes ye

Jinkysboy

Did you get an answer to your question as to when the league cup semi final draw is on??

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend..Maggie.

You are a breath of fresh air,my dear...

I like your kinda humour... I think it's swell.

It demonstrates that you have an original turn of mind..and are not one to be anchored to the repetitive and humdrum.

Keep posting, my dear,you brighten the load.

Kojo.
yer pal.. who likes yer style.

Naw-am-urny-Bhoy, I think it's called irony !

pablophanque

29.10.1971, at an intersection in Macon,Ga. a young motorcyclist is in collision with a truck and is killed..

This version of Liz Reed is not as pyrotechnically brilliant as the one on the Fillmore East LP but is the best I could find.

[Incidentally the Allmans are one of Homer Simpson's favourite bands]

Im going into a huff here

My gold winning post at noon asked the simple question - IS the draw for the semis at Rugby park after tonights match

I asked the same question again at 1.45 and again only this time in French at 2.15 (EST le dessiner pour le demi au parc de Rugby après les ce soir égale)

Never received an answer all afternoon as the bretheren are clearly more interested in brand and Woss than the Scottish league cup.

Jinkysboy

You forgot the Simpsons! And I've no idea when the warm ball are coming out...

EHIY

Jinky,

I already tried looking but couldn´t find it.

MAybe you can find it

http://www.scottishfootballleague.com/index.cfm

to 'help' round the debate have a look at this
or click my spanner ( not a family guy line)

the greatest of them all at CP.

http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=fp05c7&s=3

jinkysboy

It was due to be done tonight live at Rugby Park with Johnathan Ross and Russell Brand doing it but i think that will be shelved.

In all honesty last year's semi final draw took place on the Thursday at holyrood and had to be redone after Scottish Parliament presiding officer Alex Fergusson mixed up the draw.

so to sum up,

I havenae got a baldy.

Mort

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend.. Awe Naw.

I must agree,pal..

I am notso poifect...infact I am not even moral.

The only difference between your idea of what is good fodder for this blog and mine..

Is that I prefer to keep my dirty and immoral inclinations , safely locked up, in Private.

If is came to a Who is the most salacious ,outragious scumbag..in all of Christedom?.. Between you and I

Well, Ah tellya....

There wid be nae contest...

I wid come up... Leering... everytime~

As I said...

This is a family blog...and is read by children

That, in essence.. says it all...

Keep it clean... as my Technical Drawing Professor always instructed.

Kojo.
yer pal...who likes ye mair and mairer.

Kojo, robbing A to fund B to curry favour with the have-nots...that's democracy no???

EHIY

The Simpsons is a football related topic - Lisbon Lions Goalie Ronnie is related.

Paul 67 any truth that Alicia has been asked to carry out the draw again

Jinkysboy

Re the Draw for the semi,s (We are being very presumptious by the way) I,m going to send an E mail to real radio at approx 6 pm if and when I get an answer I will send you a text, if you dont hear from me it means I,ve had no joy.

Cheers

Roccobhoy

Kojo, ingratiation did not work for any member of my cabinet (with the possible exception of Paul Channon) so it will not work for you either. You are in my black book and in my black book you will stay.

I plan to send my son Mark over, with the best satnav available obviously, to whatever part of the world you are in to (for the first time ever) stage a coup. You, among others, will be rounded up and subjected to one full hour of Chubby Brown at his most prurient.

Maggie(who's going to melt you down for pills and soap).

Jinkysbhoy @ 4.49

Did Paul not tell you? Your high noon 'gold winning post' was disqualified and placed last as you never ended your question with a question mark, a hanging offence in some parts.

Mort

I would trust Winning Gemmell and his merry men to make the draw before that crowd of numpties at the SFL or the Scottish Parliament.

WG - More GITW please.

WDH

Cheeky bhoy!

As Bill himself said “Welcome to the comedy of hate..come, join me...”

A comedy giant

STANDING UP..

Naw am Urny

Everyone loves a loser in these parts and naebody likes a winner

Thats it - Im retiring from all competitions from now on!!!

Im off to FF

I think Gordan will play his strongest team tonight.

BTW I hope Artur is as sprightly as he was on Saturday. That was a very cunning plan by GS to take his defenders aside before kick off to issue specific instructions - Lads, give the big man some short pass backs at the start of the game. He's been a bit rusty lately so that will get him on his toes early doors. -

You had to admire the skill of the back line as they went about their business. Pass backs to Artur were perfectly weighted so that the Pole had to tear off his goal line and race to boot the ball clear in the face of onrushing Hibs forwards. First Mick and then Barry, the latter more than once in an obvious attempt to impress in his new left back position. Around me the crowd howled their disapproval but a glance towards the dug out revealed the devilish grin on Mr Strachan's face.

The ploy was working too, for Artur made several saves, one in the world class catagory. Then, disaster ! Barry, so caught up in the amusement, lost focus and allowed Hibs in. In a flash the ball was deflected into the Celtic net. What followed was inevitable. King Artur, hell bent on retribution, ran menacingly towards the sheepish figure of another imperfect left back. The crowd hushed as words were fired at will from the furious goalkeeper's mouth. Worse was feared, and then the imperious figure of Commanding Officer Caldwell strode forward and the combatants, knowing their place, separated quietly and with heads bowed.

Gordon is persistant though, and is anxious for THG to return to the form everyone knows he is capable of. So watch out tonight to see if the same tactic is used.

Fine Girl Y'Ar.

Is the game on t.v?
I'm stuck in work til 8pm
Simpsons ?
Best ever has to be Homer singing the "Holy Goalie".

Kojo,

I gave up reading at

Is that I prefer to keep my dirty and immoral inclinations ,safely locked up in Private

I mean I know this is a virtual world but that´s really taking the biscuit.... especially if you want me to believe you. I´d rather read my smut than your made up on the spur of the moment lies :-)

As it is difficult to define the boundaries i.e one mans terrorist is another mans freedom fighter etc. and as Paul67 himself doesn´t engage in specifics as what´s allowed and whats not and has an entirely personal and random take on whats acceptable and what not I will leave it entirely up to him.

I hope thats okay with you. I should also tell you that I cant stand preachers they always end up as being exposed as being morally bankrupt.

Are you Father O´Leary per chance ?

Awe Naw

yet bud that eywiz likes yeah but thinks that your becoming a TV evangelist

pablo - I cant follow it at all now - far too confusing - which is I suppose what makes this site so interesting.

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend..Maggie..

A counted Three Guid ,ORIGINAL, Lines, in your last submission, my dear..

Now, those are not to be sneezed at..pithy, slick, original lines, like a generous Tory...are Hard tae find!

So...
If ye keep oan trucking like ye ur daein...

I am thinking o' reviving my Double act..in the Boom Boom Room at Ceasars..

Wid ye be interested, hen?

Kojo.
yer pal..who likes tae like ye.

01Bhoy

Plumes of fag smoke during an afternoon game and red pinpoints at night games.
The floodlights goIng on to full power at European games about 10mins before the KO
Standing on cans to see the game
Shamrock corner flags
Guys lying drunk on the terraces

Them were days lad.

Kojo

am thinking o' reviving my Double act..in the Boom Boom Room at Ceasars..

I print a wee harmless schoolboy joke and you publicise you and your buddies depraved sexual activities.

Tut Tut Kojo

OnemanonewomanCSC

Kojo, I am beginning to think that you ARE Paul Channon. I have to decline your offer...the sound "boom boom" will forever be associated in my total recall memory with the glorious and courageous sinking of the General Belgrano and other heroic state-sponsored criminal acts of aggression. I would prefer that memory to be unsullied by an association with burlesque in a posh frock.

Maggie

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend... Awe Naw

It is perfectly alright,what you have proposed with me,pal.

Go right ahead..

Submit whatever you wish.

I cannot stoap ye.

Kojo.
yer pal..wno likes ye a loat.

My dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,dear,friend.. Maggie.

PIty..

Somehow I had expectations of re-livin' my halcyon days, with a worthy Partner...

A la, George and Gracie~

You're right,babe..

One kin nevah go back.

Kojo.
yer pal..who likes ye mair and mairer.

..and may I also reiterate, this lady is not for turning and, no matter what the pinko pacifist liberal press said, NEITHER WAS THE BELGRANO!!! I am innocent of any war crime (in the more conventional sense) and I refuse to be judged unfairly!

As the judiciary in this country said all through my glorious reign "Innocent until proven Irish"

inkybhoy

“I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. 'I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs.' 'I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking.' 'Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding out both puppets.

Bill Hicks

thought this one was appropriate.

Look up his quotes pages -Priceless.

WishawTim / O1bhoy,

we all missed the most obvious one.

When the games finished at twenty to 5.

On Saturday I almost went home at halftime as I was convinced that the game had been abandoned and the PA system stopped working.

How long does half time last now ?

It is not unusual to be still in the ground at 5pm.

Seville.67

WDH

Clearing stuff out the other day, found a MiniDisc of Arizona Bay. Hadn't heard it for ages.

If only he was still alive - how much material would he have had to work with!

STANDING UP....

Famine Song

STV evening news headline is "As rangers fans are warned they will be arrested they complain they are being victimised"

For a change the news will be worth watching

Favourite Simpson line is in Treehouse of Horrors with Homer as King Kong. Burns and Smithers are at the dock ready to sail to Monster island when Marge comes up to them to ask to go with them.

When Burns asks Smithers what he thought about hiring Marge, Smithers says, "I think women and sea-men don't mix." Burns replies, "We know what you think!"

Fair point in that there will be dissenters either way, but i'm certainly not prepared to accept defeat :-) I remember a young MON team sent to tynecastle in a midweek cup tie and destroyed them in a very impressive manner, i think 4-0 or 4-2(a similar young team may have went in an end of season game as well and had the other score)

I think to play back up / youth players and lessen our chances of winning the game is a more acceptable risk than losing more key players to injury(and of course a full team could lose the game as well). When else do our young players get a chance? Caddis was undoubtably our most impressive pre-season performer(along with JVOH) but has disappeared off the map. Sheridan is only in because of injury. Play the back ups as they need games and throw in two or three of most promising youth players and give them a chance to shine under the spotlight with a live TV audience.

The major reason people seem to give in favour of a full team is to stop Rangers winning the trophy which to me is incredibly narrow-minded. In fact on the contrary, is it not more of a 'brass neck' for Rangers to celebrate winning a trophy that we had no interest in?

If Boruc / Caldwell / Brown / McDonald are added to our ever increasing injury list in a meaningless game 4 days before we play Hearts at Tynecastle and 7 days before Man Utd at home then the criticism will be helluva lot more vociferous than if the youth team lose the game.

And if the youth team wins........then maybe we have more 1st team options

Kojo

Maybe you can do your best Chuck Heston impersonation and climb up Mount Timnai look for a burning Bush (hopefully George W.) and come down with the 10 CQN Commandments to present to all the Timmite posters and lurkers.

I'll start it off

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2)
3)
4)
5)
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

Exodus CSC

Inkybhoy / WDH

Hicks was class - only relatively recently got round to catching up on his stuff (a mate lent me the Totally Bill Hicks dvd) but it was every bit as good as I'd heard. Said what he thought and didn't give a high street fashion store what anyone thought - including his audience.

When I was speaking about comedians as social commentators Hicks was uppermost in my mind. Far more scathing than any political commentator in the media...

EHIY

Talk of comedy, I'll add this as one of my all time favourites
not sure if it played in the UK or Eire

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1wztVx2a6g

gsu

TNT

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)
4)
5)
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

seville.67

it takes so long at half time because of the people who have to wait for 25 minutes, get to the front and be told ther is nothing left or you need to go to the other kiosk for this or that....

bring back the rolls and spam in the cardboard box....

gsu

Great shout! And a fantastic theme song. The series was cracking but I loved the movie too - Sutherland and Gould were brilliant...

EHIY

TNT

thou shall not debate catholic schools
thou shall not debate ira songs

this ones for edward;

thou shall not covet another mans football team.

WDH, you got mail.

pablophanque

Cardinal O brien declares TF racist and after poice issue warning to fans that they will be arrested ,rangersfc have still not condemmed it ,blaming victimisation,human rights lawyer says a debate is needed,stv trying to act impartial but bernard ponsonby decribes it as indefencibable calling it a breach of the peace,back to the studio needless to say the follow followers are not very happy absolutely in perma rage I think
look out for the fire works

bernard ponsonby making headlines csc

blantyretim

Thou only get one commandment thou shall not present yourself a more holy Joe poster than anyone else

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)
5)
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) Thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster" on your first post
3) Thou shall not debate catholic schools
4) Thou shall not debate ira songs
5) Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

nbt

i apologise, 3 hail marys and 4 our fathers

TNT

That's me goosed then! Someone else can take up the torch and claim it if they wish....

EHIY

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not covet your neighbor's house (even if it is worth £100 MILLION
4)
5)
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

Thou shalt not pretend to be Nigel Mansell

Thou shalt not refer to thyself as a "happy shafter"

Thou shalt submit CQN commandment suggestions in groups of three only

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) Thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster" on your first post
3) Thou shall not debate catholic schools
4) Thou shall not debate ira songs
5) Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
6)Thou shall not use sweary words
7)
8)
9)
10)

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) Thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster" on your first post
3) Thou shall not debate catholic schools
4) Thou shall not debate ira songs
5) Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
6) You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Gord
7)
8)
9)
10)

Fergus what does covet your neighbhours hoose have to do with the CQN, you have to do better

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

EHIY

Get a hold of aforementioned Arizona and Rant in E Minor, two albums full of the best Hicks. American Scream is also a great book, giving an insight into what made him great.

loumacarisbettingslip

Mr Ponsonby is, of course, a fully paid-up, season ticket-holding Celtic fan. Good guy.

STANDING UP

Thou shalt not post Genesis songs even on the night shift

notoneofthepeepil

Can't believe the rest of us missed out on that - it's a family show!

EHIY

4 to go

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Ghord
6)
7)
8)
9)
10)

Thou shalt not speak in ama rangs

Oops Thou should have study harder at ya sums 5 left

TNT

Er, I make it 5 mate...

EHIY

Cadizzy you'll burn in lleh for that one

Can I suggest

You shall bear false witness against your southside neighbor

NBT

are you the son or the holy ghost?
because as we all know paul in the top kiddie on this site

Mort

Average players who wouldn’t get a game are never an issue e.g. Coyne and Coyle. Fans are ordinary people who are not interested in the strictly theoretical. Its practical not principle. In fact a lot wont even know about McClean. I only heard third hand and have not even looked it up because I don’t care. However, a country's best players who could do a job are expected by the vast majority of the population who care about football to make themselves available until at least into their 20s. Anything less than that is selfish. They would be selected by then if they are good anyway. Ray Houghton didn’t get a rough ride because fans understood he was never getting a game for his own country and he had put out the 'come and get me' until he gave up at about 22/23.

Aidan and McCarthy are in a different category being young and exceptional. Losing really good players to the granny rule has never happened before. Choosing your own country is an easy decision that 90% can make in your sleep at age 8 but a hugely unconventional and controversial, life-changing decision like shunning your own country simply shouldn’t be made at 15, 16 etc. They are too young to know what they have thrown away and the grim alternative in terms of public opinion they now face, They could have been a Dalgleish, Jordan, Brember, Law, Gemmill type hero who would never have to put their hand in their pocket again but instead will be held in at least some degree of distain permanently by I am sure about 80% of the population.

It really isn’t just bigots who feel that way and its lazy thinking and/or tribal mindset to think so. I know a good number of tims who are also national team fans and they are unhappy too. Their numbers are growing. Recent polls on Celtic sites show that among young Scottish born Celtic supporters about three support Scotland to every one who supports Ireland. So plenty of us are unhappy too.

DBBIA,

where are you when we need you most ?

Spelling can get you into trouble CSC

blantyretim

No the Golden Calf you are all doom

Thou shall not get any work done but read CQN instead

thou shall not buy redtops in this country.

thou shall eventually belong to someones clique

re ama rangs...the only funny joke I ever heard from Andy Cameron

Guy in baker's "Is that a doughnut or a meringue.."
Naw, yer right enough, It's a doughnut

thou shalt not laugh at Andy Cameron jokes.

Tommy Cooper said he went on a whisky diet. He's lost 4 days already

discussing the racist song on snyde

Thou shall not let OldTim get in a huge expensive round at BBs.

notoneofthepeepil only one per poster

I make it three to go

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Ghord
6)Thou shall not get any work done but read CQN instead
7)thou shall not buy redtops in this country.
8)
9)
10)

thou shalt not.....unless I damn' well say so

caddizzy

talking about doughnuts

i was at blackpool last weekend and a guy from North ireland called them gravy rings.

any of our ghuys from the emerald isle shed any light, he was from the wrong end of the town.

Ah well.

EHIY,
totally agree the movie was class, took me a couple of years to notice the series, but once I started I was hooked, Hawkeye could have been a Celtic man.

gsu

) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Ghord
6)Thou shall not get any work done but read CQN instead
7)thou shall not buy redtops in this country.
8)Thou shall not violate the language
9)
10

Media savvy chic dung refuses to roll up trouser leg for camera, knows all too well the connotations.

) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Ghord
6)Thou shall not get any work done but read CQN instead
7)thou shall not buy redtops in this country.
8)Thou shall not violate the language
9)Thou shall not be cliquish
10

gsu

margaret thatcher

no child's milk robber is allowed to suggest a CQN commandment now get back to your grave vampire

One left should Paul67 get it

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Ghord
6)Thou shall not get any work done but read CQN instead
7)thou shall not buy redtops in this country.
8)Thou shall not violate the language
9)Thou shall not be cliquish
10

TMFGKW

An excellent post - I have mates from various other SPL clubs (including more enlightened members of the FOD) and to a man your post sums up their attitude.

Personally I had one Irish grandparent but while I keep an eye out for Ireland's results or support them in a 'neutral' game, if I'd had the talent of a McGeady or a McCarthy my dream scenario would've been to pull on the Hoops and then the dark blue of Scotland.

That said the treatment dished out to the pair is unacceptable - but like you I don't think it's necessarily down to bigoted behaviour (although in some cases it no doubt will be).

EHIY

blantyretim

Yes. Have herad them called that - but not for a few years now.

We're an odd bunch over here!!

Cadizzy, roon yeh :o(

pablophanque

Thou shall not say anything positive about Ayrshire or its inhabitants except Edward sometimes (DBBIA would have posted this if he had been here).

cheers lurgan53

any word yet of the team for tonight?

Narrowbhoat, you know she is not yet dead...she just smells bad.

Blantyretim

I only know gravy rings from a Van Morrison song(A sense of Wonder). I assumed they had something to do with gravy but I suppose a ring of gravy doesn't really make sense. Mind you, it doesn't seem to be a sensible description of doughnuts (which of course are really dough rings..

"There's a hole in your penny ther's a hole right through
Said I there's a hole in your doughnut too"
Best ever song, along with Ali Bali Bee, (sp?) for getting weans off to sleep

10 commandments

themanfromghordknowswhere,

I can understand where you are coming from but I don't agree, but then that's easy for me to say as I am Irish and happy to have all the good players we can get.

The grandparent rule is there and has been used by a large number of countries including France (who won the World Cup with a large number of players born outwith France), Portugal and Germany. Even Scotland have exploited this rule so whats good for the goose is good for the gander.

to all of us making commandment suggestions

thou shalt not give up thy day job

Cadizzy, may all your doughnuts turn out like.......................... ach yeh know the rest :o)))

pablophanque

I cant believe the we are still discussing national allegances, both these young players were treated appallingly in their youth by the scottish set up, not till they proved their skills were not a flash in the pan did the national coaches take an interest too late by then, so blame the national sectarian football association for thier policies not the boys who suffered discrimination throughout their youth.

I was stating the other day to a FOD fan that if you are a 15 year old promising Scottish footballer and Scotland shows no interest and Ireland or Wales or England did you would jump at the chance. This is more about personal advancement and the opportunity to possibly embark on a lucrative and promising career. Any 14 or 15 year old is going to jump at that opportunity. It would be folly bordering on madness to turn that down.

If the SFA wasn´t so obsessed with maintaining the mafia for the mediocre status quo and diligently pursued promising Scottish youth and had a credible setup then maybe these dilemmas would not occur so regularly.

To approach a boy who has already played at three different levels for another country I thought was cheap. I would have found it even cheaper if he had ditched Ireland after Scotlands lack of interest.

No blame can be attached to those youths deciding not to chose Scotland due to a lack of encouragement.

The Narrowbhoat Tim

:))))

although the producers name at the end smaky-prod@email.com, mmmm

The manfrom..... so much I could say about that, but leave it at most tims I know dont care about national teams, Scotland, Ireland, whoever. To be honest I think part of Celtic's hold on many fans is partly because of its bi national identity.

STV is now self parody. The famine song is tonight main news. It has hardly mentioned before on STV media, news, text, wherever, apart from the odd mutter, before moving swiftly on. It as if it wasn't really happening.

The rangers supprters are now the victims of the famine song, "Not the 9 o'clock news" was never this comic cutting edge. Now that his BBC gig is cancelled, we might see Russel Brand re appear on STV news.

Pablo ;-))) that one goes back many, many years!

psblo, I do indeed! The best part was when he realised his mistake and tried to make it better by saying "Oh no! I don't hope your doughnuts turn out etc...

Leabrannagh,

Scotland Today is just an extension of Rangers News.

I fully expect Martin Bain to become the next anchor man

or to be more precise " I hope your doughnuts don't turn out lik...
Lhondondave, my recollection was that it was Bill Tennent, Is that right?

commandment
thou shall not throw in thy towel.
hail hail

o1 bhoy
thank you for that i admit to being a 20 out of 20 guy there . may i add the 1 about when the ball hit the roof of the old jungle we all closed our eyes otherwise you got blinded by a shower of rust. a walk down memory lane right enough .

re the debate on the merit of the league cup. i would love to see us playing our young bhoys,and give them a chance. but i can also agree with a fellow poster on here who states if we dont win the cup, rangers will. and none of us want that do we(except our friend edward. also i watched our reserve team last week against hamilton reserves.a very comfortable win for the bhoys, who played some lovely stuff.but i cannot remember as small a celtic team. i am always on about this ,but is this only a worry to me .or do any other of my fellow posters find this the same.

Bill Tennent, correct, Cadizzy.

Not that I remember it masel, ma faither tellt me.

cadizzy
it was john toye on scotland today ,classic tv moment

You sure, fstb?

01bhoy

Remember when before the game the tv commentator made his way across the walkway above the jungle to the camera gantry. Erchie and Arthur got pelters

Sorry guys but I'm sure the "doughnut" comment was made by Michael Barratt on Nationwide in the early 70's.

Avert thou eyes and on yer knees and tremble

CQN 10 Commandments

1) Thou shall not visit any other blog but CQN
2) On your first post thou shall use the phrase "long time lurker, first time poster"
3)Thou shall not debate catholic schools/ ra songs
4)Thou shall take a deep breath and bring some perspective prior to posting after a defeat
5)You shall not make wrongful use of the name of our Ghord
6)Thou shall not get any work done but read CQN instead
7)thou shall not buy redtops in this country.
8)Thou shall not violate the language
9)Thou shall not be cliquish
10Thou shall not throw in thy towel.

And # 11) Only the one true Paul67 can post "New Article Posted"

leabrannagh

Thats not all it was reported on the bbc that STV news will be looking for a public subsidy by 2010 due to falling revenue,makes you think it will be us who will be subsidising Ramman,and the rest of that bunch

kojo predictor

Kilmarnock 0 celtic 69

please note the celtic score wasnt a mission position statement

lhondondave
I remember t to this day and often mention it when the tv blooper shows are on
fanny craddock was on making doughnuts ,at the end it went to john toye to say goodbye .then came the immortal line ,can still see his face now with the camera shaking up and down because the cameraman was p***ing himself .

Come to think of it, maybe it was Jeremy Paxman on Newsnight.

Am being obedient to the Sixth Commandment here.

I wrote a post the other night about why Rangers do not deserve to be supported in their efforts to tackle the issue of the Famine song. Due to my own fault the post was deleted. ( I used a word with an eff followed by a series of asteriks.)

I made the point that rangers have done nothing to warrant such support. Every change they have made they have been coerced into, and with a nudge and a wink to their core traditional support. From - watch those sectarian songs lads, that UEFA lot may close one of our stands- to - be careful with that Famine song, boys, you might end up in the jail.

The Famine song, like the BJK campaign, is a symptom of an illness rooted in generational hatred. Rangers do not condemn the symptoms so what chance of them tackling the illness ? None, I imagine. Bain plays the banter card while Murray and Smith come out against website bile yet, fearful of a time of possible dwindling attendances, refuse to condemn the racism of their supporters.

The SPL and SFA will do nothing unless they can rope Celtic into the issue. Then, only then, will they even consider sanctions. The recent T Shirt court case opens the door to this.

True to form Rangers have issued a statement tonight defending the racists in their support. It goes without saying they did not go anywhere near telling their fans to stop singing TFS because, quite simply, it is wrong.

Rangers supporters, in their eagerness to replace the banned Billy Boys, have scored a massive own goal. Despite the likes of Leckie and Traynor the consensus now is that TFS is indeed racist. Those same fans will not be so foolhardy the next time. They will come up with other vile songs and chants. When this happens Rangers Football Club will not be tested as some believe. All they will do is breath a heavy sigh of relief.

Fine Girl Y'Ar/

Aw naw, I think he prefers being editor or to be more apt, comic writer.

Yep, remember all those details, fergus, but could have sworn is was Bill Tennent, not Toye. Have a feeling it was a lunchtime show?

Awe Naw (here we go again!)

You say it would be folly to not take this choice for personal advancement. Let me give you a hypothetical scenario:

You are a promising young footballer on the books of say, Montrose, and you are also a dyed in the wool Hoops fan. Then Rangers FC come calling at your door saying they are massively interested in you and think you have what it takes to go all the way. They want to give you a decent salary and attempt to fast track you to the first XI (not unbelievable given some of the donkeys they've got).

Do you:

a) Sign on the dotted line without a second thought - this is the perfect opportunity for career advancement

OR

b) Mull it over, and decide that you just aren't one of them and if you really are that good then someone else (maybe even your beloved Hoops) will hopefully come along and offer you a similar opportunity. It might take a little longer but will be worth it in the long term.

This is question that purely relates to the argument that it's ok to make this decision at that age for the good of your career. Just playing devil's advocate...

EHIY

Guys...it doesn't matter who said the 'doughnut' thingy...can he play left-back??

Pablo you have mail as per earlier post today.

Vmhan

Any team news yet bhoys?

EHIY

?
?
caldwell
odea
?
nakamura
donati
brown
mcgeady
maloney
mcdonald

Speaking of Doughnuts

I've read that there was an magazine advert in Britain in the 1950s which stated "Our muffins are warm and sticky, just like Fanny's"

Any teams news?

sheridan and mccourt on bench

new article posted.

Gallowgate, excellent post; Lackie and Traynor will no doubt follow follow the party line after Bain's statement, but thankfully they have scored few own goals themselves lately.

EHIY,

I´m sure guys like Brian Mc Lean ;-) and Chris Burke have already faced similar issues. The point is when your 14 how often do you make those decisions on your own. You are normally counseled by your parents. You then have to make that call off definitely Rangers versus possibly Celtic.

Personally I would never play for Rangers and I would advise my son also not too, as personal advancement is not just about money or improving as a player. Its also about honor and dignity and integrity.

I dont accept that your analogy is congruent and therefore stand by that any offer coming in at that point needs careful consideration. If that decision is made then you stand by it unless you think that you are being treated unfairly or that you made initially the wrong decision when you were 14.

That´s not happened.

Hail Hail

Bill Tennent it was who uttered the immortal words, following a cookery spot by Johnny and Fanny Craddock.
Mr. Tennent said
'I hope your doughnuts all turn out like fannies'

If you are still getting stick from Rangers` fans about our defeat by Man U, perhaps you could remind them of how they fared against a Utd team not as good as the one we faced. This report was from the BBC website, normally quite reluctant to criticize Rangers.

Man Utd crush sad Rangers


Photos from Old Trafford

Man Utd 3-0 Rangers

Manchester United moved to the brink of the Champions League knockout stage with a comprehensive dismissal of Rangers at Old Trafford.

In-form Diego Forlan set the Premiership champions on the way to a double over their Scottish counterparts with a spectacular goal after five minutes.

Ferguson hails "fantastic" Keane

And Ruud van Nistelrooy ended his barren spell with strikes either side of the interval to leave Alex McLeish's side well beaten.

Rangers must now fight secure their own place in the next phase of the Champions League with United poised to qualify in comfort.

Player ratings

As a so-called "Battle of Britain" it was a one-sided affair, with a joyous Old Trafford crowd taunting the Rangers fans about their Premiership pretensions long before the end.

KEY MOMENTS
5 mins: Forlan puts Manchester United ahead
42 mins: Van Nistelrooy doubles Manchester United's lead
59 mins: Van Nistelrooy gets his second and United's third

United boss Sir Alex Ferguson went for an attacking formation - with Forlan alongside Van Nistelrooy, and Ryan Giggs and Cristiano Ronaldo raiding down the flanks.

And it was a move that reaped an instant reward when Forlan put United ahead in clinical fashion.

Roy Keane's cross was only partially cleared and Forlan took full advantage to fire a crisp right-foot volley past Stefan Klos.

Rangers were off the pace as United remained on cruise control, although Michael Mols should have done better when he found space from Michael Ball's pass.

Ball was in action to clear off the line from Giggs before United doubled their advantage three minutes before half-time.

Ronaldo's deep cross was met by Giggs, and when Forlan's volley rattled the bar, Van Nistelrooy scored via a fortunate rebound.

Fantastic goal by Forlan and his general play was pretty good

From Red Devil 4 Life
Have your say on 606
There was no luck required when United went three ahead on the hour, with Van Nistelrooy poaching to turn Giggs' free-kick past Klos from close range.

It gave Ferguson the opportunity to rest key players such as Giggs, Van Nistelrooy and Forlan ahead of the crucial trip to Liverpool.

United goalkeeper Tim Howard was virtually a redundant figure, only troubled once by Ball's free-kick.

And for Rangers, it was a sobering experience as United exerted complete supremacy over the Scots, who now face an uphill struggle to qualify from the group stage.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Man Utd: Howard, G Neville, Ferdinand, Silvestre, Fortune, Ronaldo, P Neville, Keane, Giggs (Bellion 67), Forlan (Kleberson 67), Van Nistelrooy (Fletcher 77).
Subs not used: Carroll, Butt, Djemba-Djemba, O'Shea.

Rangers: Klos, Khizanishvili, Moore (Ross 68), Berg, Ball, Arteta, Hughes, Arveladze, Vanoli (Burke 83), Mols (Capucho 56), Lovenkrands.
Subs Not Used: McGregor, Emerson, Ostenstad, Dowie.

Attendance: 66,707.

Referee: Pierluigi Collina (Italy).

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WATCH AND LISTEN
Rangers boss Alex McLeish
"We were well beaten by a top, top side"

Man Utd boss Sir Alex Ferguson
"The early goal helped us"

MANCHESTER UNITED
Your say - 606
Weather
BBC Manchester sport
Official club website

RANGERS
My Sport - Rangers debate
Weather
BBC Scotland
Official club website

SEE ALSO
Champions League tables
21 Oct 03 | Football

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