I BELIEVED we were about to witness a piece of TV history last night.
I was convinced we would be treated to the spectacular sight of spontaneous combustion among the talking heads.
Apoplexy reigned among the nodding dogs as they spluttered in unison and indignation about the award of a penalty-kick to Celtic in the fading moments of stoppage-time with the scoreline tied at 2-2 against Motherwell at Fir Park.
“Never a handball,” chimed the posturing gasbags as they vented their collective spleen.
“The worst VAR decision ever since the dawn of time,” they muttered in righteous anger.
“It’s a scandalously bad decision,” seethed another who appears to have perfected the art of seething.
PICTORIAL EVIDENCE…Sam Nicholson’s hand makes contact with the ball as he challenges Auston Trusty to a throw-in from Anthony Ralston.
They were, of course, united in outrage as they looked again at footage of Well’s Sam Nicholson challenging Auston Trusty to a high ball after Anthony Ralston had propelled a throw-in from the right touchline.
For reasons known only to himself, the home defender decided to raise his hands into an unnatural position. When the ball arrived, his hand was level with his head.
It also looked like the Celt received an elbow in the face for his trouble.
The clearing header, after the ball had brushed off Nicholson’s arm, went straight out of play.
Referee John Beaton was not required to rule on a handball incident or stop play because it had already been halted with the ball no longer active as Ralston anticipated another shy.
Andrew Dallas, in front of the screens, presumably recommended a VAR review and called for the onfield official to look again at a potential penalty-kick on the touchline monitor.
Beaton did so and, within 20 seconds, had viewed enough evidence of a handball to return to the field and point to the spot.
Kelechi Iheanacho did the needful and the champions are now required to see off Hearts at Parkhead on Saturday afternoon to collect their fifth successive title.
IT’S A PENALTY-KICK…John Beaton points to the spot after a quickfire VAR review. Motherwell defender Emmanuel Longelo gets that sinking feeling.
That distinct possibility was too much to contemplate for the so-called “experts” who became more than a tad hysterical and wild-eyed as they went into animated burble overdrive.
I’m sure I saw traces of foam forming on the mouths of a couple of the prattling pundits.
Amid the verbal vehemence, the camera switched to Derek McInnes at Tynecastle to get his view.
“Disgusting,” said the erudite Hearts manager. “We are up against everybody. I don’t think it’s a penalty.”
“Scandalous,” echoed his studio supporters.
“Embarrassing,” they rambled long into the night.
Could there be any truth in the tale that the Samaritans Hotline went into meltdown after 10pm?
Dummies were ricocheting around the Milky Way long after midnight and toys didn’t stand a chance of remaining in the pram.
Astonishing, isn’t it? I don’t recall such livid ramifications when the same Auston Trusty was banished after a mystifying VAR call in Celtic’s 2-2 stalemate against Wee Derek’s team in Edinburgh on January 25.
SEALED WITH A KISS…Kelechi Iheanacho prepares to take the crucial penalty-kick.
To refresh your memory, referee Steven McLean booked the American international after a coming together with Landy Kabore well outside the box while Dane Murray offered protection.
The Hearts forward went down theatrically and his banshee-screeching team-mates clamoured around the match official waving imaginary cards in the air. A mere booking was not sufficient punishment, they insisted as they swarmed around the whistler.
Unfortunately, John Beaton was on VAR duties that day and he agreed with them.
McLean glanced at the monitor, scrapped the yellow card, produced the red and that was the end of the action for Trusty as he was dismissed in the 74th minute, a point at which Celtic were winning 2-1 and looking fairly comfortable.
The hosts equalised in the 87th minute and stoppage-time of eight minutes was magically produced. The 10 men held out for a draw.
Martin O’Neill, who will never be famous for his controversial comments, later observed: “I’ve seen it back and it’s not a red card at all.
“A couple of things – first of all, the ball’s not going directly towards goal so the player will have to come round and manoeuvre it to try and get a shot off.
“And the second thing is, we’ve got cover.”
HAVING A BALL…Kelechi Iheanacho sweeps in the spot-kick winner with an anxious Anthony Ralston looking on.
The Irishman could have added Kabore would have had to be on an invisible motorbike if the foul was deemed as preventing a goalscoring opportunity.
The Hearts manager looked particularly smug that afternoon in the capital.
Aah well, there you go, Derek, swings and roundabouts, old bean.
In the meantime, the angry brigade can continue to work themselves into a ferment.
Who cares?
Action speaks louder than words, so they say, and Celtic will emphasise that fact on Saturday afternoon in the east end of Glasgow.
No doubt the serial complainers will have something else to whine about.
I sincerely hope so.
ALEX GORDON
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