MAYBE Philippe Clement was born glum.
The stone-faced Rangers manager certainly won’t wear out his teeth with all that grinning. Big Phil appears to adopt the perpetual frown of the mug punter who continually backs the runner-up in a one-horse race.
As the replacement for the bungling Michael Beale in October 2023, Clement’s arrival on these shores was hailed by folk who should know a lot better as the answer to all the Ibrox ills.
There were even preposterous and hysterical claims of “a seismic change” in power between the Glasgow clubs.
Back then, I said in this column that wishful thinking and the frantic need for some sembalnce of positivity in Govan had blinded some so-called expert observers.
TIME’S UP…Philippe Clement checks his watch as the Ibrox side head for a fall in Paisley.
I made the point that some critics mislaid their objectivity in their emotional surge for something to cling to in the forlorn hope of an end to a wretched period in the team’s erratic existence. They confused good results with good performances.
There is just so often you can rely on VAR-assisted penalty-kicks to throw you a lifeline when the points are slipping away late in a game, as witnessed in matches against Hearts at Ibrox and Aberdeen at Pittodrie.
When Clement suffered his first Premiership reversal – a 2-1 loss against Celtic in the east end of Glasgow at the tail-end of December 2023 – cracks started to appear in the veneer.
The witless Ibrox hierarchy, since gone the way of the dodo, protested at not being awarded a penalty-kick long after they had the opportunity to view images that proved conclusively one of their players was blatantly offside in the build-up.
Clement went along with it. After winning the League Cup in one of the most tedious silverware showdowns in recent memory 13 days before the loss at Parkhead, it’s been downhill all the way for the Belgian who must realise he is one defeat away from being handed his P45.
THAT WINNING FEELING…Brendan Rodgers and his triumphant Celtic players after the team’s Premier Sports League Cup success at Hampden last month.
He and his players celebrated wildly after an equaliser deep in stoppage-time gave them a 3-3 draw with Brendan Rodgers’ men the last time the champions were in the vicinity.
Clement led his team on a lap of honour that April afternoon which looked all the more foolish when you reflect they limped in nine points adrift of Celtic six league games later as the crown maintained its residence in Paradise.
Credit where credit is due, though, dear reader. The performances at Hampden in both last season’s Scottish Cup Final and last month’s Premier Sports League Cup shoot-out have been well above the anticipated level.
However, second prizes don’t count for much in Glasgow.
Or Monte Carlo, for that matter. Clement lasted 18 unsuccessful months at Monaco before he got the boot.
It’s evident the tag of serial loser is one the under-pressure Govan gaffer doesn’t welcome. He reaches out to emphasise that luck deserts his team in pressurised circumstances.
I’m not even going to repeat all the guff that has filled the airwaves since the Liam Scales/Vaclav Cerny coming-together that left Big Phil “mentally scarred for life”.
He keeps a straight face when he gives his considered opinion of last month’s derby and tells Sky Sports viewers: “We deserved to win.”
The banal Belgian lobs in: “We had the best chances and some other circumstances also.”
HEAD-SCRATCHER…Philippe Clement looks mystified in his side’s 2-2 draw at Motherwell.
No-one can be exactly sure what he means by that remark. It’s part of a mystifying catalogue he will leave behind after he gets the inevitable heave-ho.
There is no dubiety, though, over another comment during the week. Reflecting on the 2-1 loss in Paisley and 2-2 draw at Fir Park, he delivered this considered sermon: “Everybody who has seen the two games against Motherwell and St Mirren – we were the team who deserved to win these games with the amount of chances that we had.”
Then this Aristotle of the touchline added the classic line: “Those goals against us made a really big difference in those games.”
Gee thanks, Phil. So that’s how football works? The team that puts the ball twixt the uprights more often than their opponents get to keep the points. Glad you cleared that up.
So, what can we expect in the aftermath of tomorrow’s match against Celtic? Has the Rangers manager already thumbed through ‘The Big Book of Football Excuses’ as he prepares to provide another explanation if things don’t go quite according to plan?
The best he can hope for is any kind of win which will leave his team 11 points behind the champions. Will he genuinely believe that will signal a calamitous collapse at Parkhead to open the door to the most unlikely triumph since David knocked out Goliath?
At the moment, Brendan Rodgers’ Celtic side are unbeaten in their last TWENTY-SEVEN Premiership games.
When I think about it, it’s little wonder Big Phil hasn’t indulged in charisma overload for the past year or so.
A Happy New Year to one and all and I hope 2025 is a wonderful, enjoyable and healthy year for everyone.
ALEX GORDON
