CELTIC fans will have to live with the fact that it is more likely to discover the moon is made of the finest Dutch Edam than Filipe Jota ever donning a green and white top again.

Appealing thought though it may be to thrillseekers everywhere, it is NOT going to happen.
I’m reading tales that the Portuguese maverick apparently “would love” to return to the Scottish champions.
Look, dear reader, I would love to live on a Greek island, possess a private Learjet, own an ocean-going liner and have a limitless supply of dosh.
It ain’t going to happen. Somehow I will have to dredge up the willpower and strength of character to deal with it.
HOOPS, I’VE DONE IT AGAIN…Filipe Jota celebrates a Celtic goal with the Ibrox support refusing to acknowledge his achievement.
One media outlet was astute enough to inform me wages “could scupper” any prospect of a deal. Really? You don’t say.
Is that the £200,000-per-WEEK Jota is currently earning in Saudi Arabia after signing a three-year deal worth circa £30million? Tax free.
Even Dermot would be forced to join the entire Celtic board in a darkened room as they dealt with the palpitations at the very thought of attempting to shell out even a fraction of that sort of money.
The flamboyant former fans’ favourite was a bit of a phenomenon at Parkhead after arriving as a virtual unknown on a season-long loan from Benfica in the summer of 2022 as Ange Postecoglou expertly sifted through the wreckage of the previous error-strewn campaign.
The easy-on-the-eye performer played his part in the club’s revival and subsequent lifting of five out of six domestic honours up for grabs during his illuminating two-year interlude in Glasgow.
On July 4 last year, Jota cut all ties with the champions, signing off with the third goal in the 3-1 Scottish Cup Final triumph over Inverness Caley Thistle at sunlit Hampden the previous month.
The victory brought the Hoops their eighth domestic treble, a world record, and, as far as last hurrahs go, it wasn’t a bad way to take a final bow.
The wee man always had class.
DREAM MOVE…Filipe Jota in action for Al-Ittihad shortly after his £25million switch.
His fellow-Portuguese, Nuno Espirito Santo, spirited him off in a £25million fee to cash-rich Al-Ittihad, but dreams have a cruel habit of hitting the buffers.
Jota struggled to make an immediate impact, Santo was sacked and is now operating in the less sulubrious surroundings of Nottingham Forest, the ever-smiling touchline operator appears surplus to requirements and, according to one enlightening report, is about “to be shown the door”.
Solid gold, presumably.
You better believe a phalanx of Philadelphian lawyers will have scrutinised Jota’s three-year contract with the Middle East outfit before pen was put to paper.
Jota has now reached the grand old age of 25 and he will be wily enough to be setting aside a nest egg for his retirement.
My imagination doesn’t stretch to our former hero standing on touchlines or sitting in dug-outs barking out orders to his players once the boots are put away.
Jota looks a certainty for punditry – God forbid, Portugal’s very own Wee Ally – when that day arrives.
Hopefully, that will be a few years away and this entertaining showman can continue to add colour to an often drab soccer picture.
Alas, it will not be at Celtic – no matter how much you and I relish the thought.
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