THE small object which has been detected orbiting the globe since around 3pm on Saturday appears to have been identified as a dummy belonging to a Mr P Clement of Govan.

Oh dear, the Ibrox manager is not a happy chappie. It didn’t take too long for a crack to appear in the veneer, did it?

After 16 games in the country, the Belgian was wall-to-wall grins and the world was a beautiful place. One defeat and the smile has turned upside down.

VAR copped it at the weekend with some absurd and totally illogical comments in the fall-out of a 2-1 loss to the champions at Parkhead.

This is the same off-field technical assistance that was being praised to the heavens by the same Mr P Clements of Govan just last month.

WHAT’S ALL THE FUSS ABOUT? Picture proof that Abdullah Sima was offside at the Alistair Johnston “handball incident”.

On November 26, the smirking gaffer delivered his unimpeachable view on VAR when he told The Herald: “I’m a fan because it makes the game more honest.

“Of course, there are still some mistakes and some decisions that stay in a grey area. There are a lot of opinions after games. People respond and are fans for one team or another.

“But, in the end, if you are objective, you can only say VAR makes the game more honest than in my days. So, I’m a fan of that.”

No-one was unduly surprised at Clement’s rejoicing in the advantages of the multi-screen technology especially as his team had been awarded a decidedly dodgy penalty-kick in the fourth minute of stoppage-time while they were losing 1-0 to Aberdeen at Pittodrie.

Once again, James Tavernier, with his SEVENTY-THIRD penalty-kick as an Ibrox player, accepted the gift and scored to give the visitors a point.

OVER THE TOP…Connor Godson challenges Paulo Barenardo.

It had been a similar situation, late in October with the team toiling 1-0 down to Hearts at Ibrox. With one minute to go, Connor Goldson theatrically threw himself to the ground as a corner-kick swirled into the box, ref John Beaton saw nothing untoward before being instructed by VAR to review the incident.

Surprise! Surprise! The match official returned to the pitch and pointed to the spot. Monotonously, Tavernier, who had actually struck the post with another penalty-kick in the first-half, trotted forward and scored. Even worse for the Edinburgh visitors, they conceded in stoppage-time and went home empty-handed.

And it was Goldson who was involved in the penalty incident in the north east when he flew through the air as though he had been fired out of a cannon after the merest of touches from the hosts’ defender Stefan Gartenmann.

“It’s not a good look for Scottish football,” insisted Dons gaffer Barry Robson after his side had befallen the same spot-kick fate as the Tynecastle outfit.

The was no need for the manager to elaborate.

However, there was a full-blown strop on the horizon when Clement’s team were not awarded a spot-kick. I didn’t notice if Michael Beale’s successor was actually stamping his feet like a petulant five year old who had just been informed he couldn’t get an ice cream, but it was a fairly impressive temper tantrum.

He wanted a spot-kick when the ball hit Alistair Johnston on the hand in an incident in which Abdullah Sima was clearly offside in the build-up.

SEEING RED…Daizen Maeda is hauled back by Leon Balogun before the Ibrox defender’s dismissal.

Disturbingly, the Govan chief also had an issue with the fact Paulo Bernardo had not seen red after a collision with the aforementioned Goldson while he believed right-back Johnston was also a lucky Bhoy for not being dismissed after an aerial joust with Sima.

Maybe Clement might want to take a peek at the Bernardo-Goldson flashpoint again, courtesy of CQN, and reconsider his view on which of the combatants should have been banished.

The Johnston/Sima incident isn’t worth talking about, but there could be a debate on the flailing arm from Dujon Sterling that smacked Matt O’Riley on the face. The Celt was floored and had to undergo two minutes of onfield medical treatment before making his way unsteadily to the touchline for more repairs while blood gushed from his nose.

With the world looking on via satellite television, the visiting manager was at least astute enough not to complain about the dismissal of Leon Balogun after he hauled down Daizen Maeda as the Japanese speedster raced in on goal.

HITTING THE BOTTLE…Philippe Clement in the dug-out at Celtic Park.

Clement, speaking to Sky Sports, bleated: “We played 15 minutes with 10 players and that was the right decision, it’s a red card.

“But I have other questions also about, why not a handball in the first-half to get a penalty? It’s a clear handball.

“Why not a second yellow card for some tackles and then at the end of the game a lot of yellow cards? A few strange decisions in that way.”

When the peeved boss was informed there was an offside before the Johnston handball incident, Clement, with masterful lack of logic, responded: “The decision was not made about an offside, the decision of no penalty was made about the handball.

“That was the decision. So that was a strange decision for me.”

Stick around, Phil. With Rangers in the vicinity, there are usually a fair amount of strange decisions from officials, on and off the pitch.

You’ll be relieved to know a fair percentage tend not to go the way of your opponents.


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