NOT SURE how they managed it, but Celtic’s players somehow contrived to sleepwalk through the din and clamour of over 50,000 frenzied fans at a toxic Ibrox yesterday.
Ignoring the fact it was the Sabbath, the Govan chorists worked their way through their raucous little ditties while Martin O’Neill’s men dozed en route to an embarrassing three-goal defeat and Premier Sports League Cup oblivion.
The manager hopes the perplexing loss and dire exhibition will act as a wake-up call to his team.
Judging by yesterday’s snoozefest among his non-performers, the Irishman might require a loan of Edinburgh Castle’s One O’Clock Gun to disturb their collective slumber.
CALM BEFORE THE STORM…Sam Johnstone loosens up at Ibrox pre-game.
I’ve been watching Celtic since God was a boy and that utterly substandard offering in Govan ranks as one of the most toothless, feeble outings from a team in green-and-white hoops it has ever been my misfortune to witness.
Sam Johnstone looked a nervous wreck in the tunnel never mind when he got onto the pitch. Martin O’Neill gambled on the keeper and the decision backfired with the direst of consequences.
The four times-capped former England international No.1 could not be held culpable for any of the three goals that thudded behind him – all three unerring shots were in the unsaveable category – but his distribution by hand or foot throughout the encounter was alarming.
Of course, he didn’t get off to the best of starts when anxiety betrayed him in the fourth minute as he attempted to play the ball out of his box to Liam Scales.
How he failed to detect the 6ft-plus presence of the guy in the light blue strip loitering with intent and standing about six yards away is anyone’s guess.
Thankfully, Kevin Kelsy was so surprised at the free gift, he snatched at the opportunity and fired the ball past the post.
Johnstone – and Celtic – escaped, but the on-loan Wolves netminder was shot to hell for the remainder of the contest, all one and half hours including stoppage-time.
The team carried Sebastian Tounekti for 45 minutes while the Tunisian displayed a mystifying aversion to running in the general direction of enemy territory.
An outfield player can get away with that, up to a certain extent, of course. However, the poor, old guy between the sticks is not so fortunate. His aberrations are punished, more often than not.
ON PATRoL…Cameron Carter-Vickers at Ibrox.
After his earlier faux pas, Johnstone then raced into traffic in an effort to claim a left-wing cross. It was a stark misjudgement, he ended up flapping at the ball and was bailed out by Liam Scales on the line when Kim Him-su attempted to capitalise on the howler.
The keeper’s jitters worked their way through the team who were hardly firing on all cylinders in any case.
No-one expects Cameron Carter-Vickers to stroll out of his defence with the ball at his feet a la Franz Beckenbauer. He is there to clear his lines without any additional frills.
When the centre-back fails to follow the basics of his function within the team structure, then the alarm bells will undoubtedly shrill.
The rugged Carter-Vickers allowed Ryan Nadieri to relieve him of the ball without too much fuss which led to the first goal.
And that was the beginning of the end. Any hopes of a treble to match O’Neill’s first silverware clean sweep in his debut season in 2000/01 were obliterated after just two outings in the first trophy up for grabs.
You can be sure the venerable 74-year-old Irishman will not be patrolling any touchlines bedecked in the latest adidas tracksuit this time next year. Not on behalf of Celtic, anyway.
It’s too easy to express bitter disappointment in the failure of your team – especially after such a timid capitulation – by taking the scattergun approach. Objectivity is lost in such moments.
ON THE RUN…Camilo Duran is a tussle with Nico Raskin.
I would exempt Colby Donovan from criticism and, to a certain extent, Scales, Mika Baur and Camilo Duran. The little German did exactly what he was bought to do and was neat and tidy in the midfield. It wasn’t easy to pick out recipients of his passes, though, as many of his colleagues had gone awol.
Duran started out of position on the right, had a stint on the left, popped up in the middle and I half-expected the Colombian to take over from Johnstone at any time.
Kasper Hogh slipped at a crucial moment when the scoreline was still blank and Donovan produced the through pass of the day.
After that, it looked as though the club’s record buy had discovered Albian Ajeti’s cloak of invisibility and disappeared from view until he resurfaced in time to be substituted.
It’s not all down to Johnstone, Carter-Vickers, Tounekti or Hogh, though. There is a collective responsibility from each and every player.
The blame must be shared among those who under-performed and that includes skipper Callum McGregor who was as guilty as anyone at surrendering possession with wasteful passes.
Martin O’Neill has already admitted he will analyse his part in the humiliation. There has to be a valid reason he gave Tounekti, an entertainer who will never be famous for his physical traits, a place in his starting line-up.
THE MISSING LINK…Haissem Hassan sat out the fist-half at Ibrox.
The manager gibbered on about leaving Haissem Hassan out at the kick-off because the Egyptian’s overnight sleep had been interrupted.
Really? Jock Stein, O’Neill’s admitted Celtic hero, would have sent out a player with a leg hanging off if he thought it would benefit the team. Big Jock would have said to Bob Rooney, the club’s trusty physiotherapist: “Get to work with the magic sponge and some Elastoplast and have him ready in a hour.”
Okay, a slight exaggeration, but you get the drift.
There is much wrong with this Celtic team. You know it, I know it and, obviously, so do the opposition.
The defence is afforded no protection from the midfield in front of them and it’s fair to say McGregor, Baur and Benjamin Nygren are not the possessors of a physical presence that allows them to go in and dig out balls in 50/50 tussles.
But there must be more backbone and strength of commitment from everyone – on and off the pitch – if this season is to be prevented from spiralling out of control.
Snooze and you lose. Celtic proved that comprehensively at Ibrox yesterday.
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