Michael, they have taken you away… from Ibrox


If you aggregate the nods, winks and rumours around Celtic this week you might be inclined to think we’re in the market for a target-man striker with a few years’ experience under his belt.  I agree with the principle that we need a target man and I’m also of the view that short-term deals are not nearly as desirable as permanent contracts, but as we know, it’s too easy to load the club full of squad players who cumulatively cost a lot of money but scarcely trouble the first team.

Hooper, Stokes, Samaras, Bangura, Rasmussen and Murphy are all under contract for next season and we cannot be confident of attracting bids for any of those Neil Lennon might want to move on.  If we add a seventh striker, his name better be on the team sheet before Gary Hooper’s.  Signing an exotic version of Daryl Murphy would add spice to our week but would only consume scarce resources.  I’d rather not.

Co-opting a media partner works in theory.  It’s always better to have good relationships with the media than the kind of relationships Celtic perennially have, but what happens when your media partner plays with a straight bat?

Rangers media partner, STV, today report Nigerian trialist, Michael Uchebo, boarded a plane out of Glasgow a few hours after arriving (Michael, they have taken you away….) as the VVV-Venlo striker with 8 career goals to his name had “a poor first impression of” Rangers.

Michael, you clearly have a rubbish strike rate but you’re a remarkably perceptive individual.

Issue 6 of CQN Magazine is currently being prepared; drop me a line if you would like to advertise, celticquicknews@gmail.com.

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  1. Ten Men Won The League on

    Unlucky Andy Murray



    You gave it a right good go son



    Hold your head up high

  2. starry plough says:


    27 January, 2012 at 13:31


    C’mon the Hibees, sink another nail into their coffin…





    Couldn’t resist a cheeky 5er on the plucky Hibees at 12/1 ;)

  3. Ten Men Won The League



    Just delighted he will be missing!



    ‘And The Walls Came A Tumbling Down…’

  4. northbhoy ... \o/ on




    Absolutely brilliant tennis what a match, remarkable athleticism, skill, blood, guts nearly as good as El Classico, or Celtic 6-2.



    Well done Andy Murray, what an epic clash. I hope he does not get too downheated and that Lendl will pick him up and work on the few weaknesses that Andy Murray has. He would surely go onto be not only a World Class player but World number One.



    C’mon Andy Murray,



    C’Mon the Big Tax Man


    Hail hail


    oglach says:



    27 January, 2012 at 12:35



    LOL another Hun target doesn’t even unpack his bags before heading off. It gets better and better. However i have noted a somewhat disturbing development in that some, alleged, Celtic fans are stating that Scottish football is heading for a disaster of biblical proportions should Rankers FC disappear? Who are these people? Are they really Celtic supporters? We should take every opportunity to rejoice in their suffering, laugh out loud as we witness their support squirm and cower and we should all fervently pray that Scottish football is finally rid of the institution of hate that is Rangers FC. Revenge is a dish that is most definitely best served cold and I for one savour every ice cold morsel. Who knows it may even be the 1st step to our entering the English league system






    Anyone thinking that MURRAY PARK is like THE PRISONER?



    Why am I here,I am a free man!



    Let me out!



    Hint to anyone wishing to leave-don’t let on that you’re free…..

  6. Ten Men Won The League on

    The below post is from the RTC site and is a reply to a Rangers fan from our very own Steinreignedsupreme. I sincerely hope he does not mind me reposting it on here


    as it is an excellent read



    RFCsupporterinpeace:27/01/2012 at 5:43 am



    No axe to grind with you and I can certainly understand why you are presenting your case.



    However, on point one – Sky’s investment in Scottish football is not so large that clubs will be unable to live without it. In fact their coverage of Scottish football is insulting (99% of live games involve Celtic or Rangers and they have a 30 minutes SPL highlights package every week).



    Personally, I would rather they didn’t bother and we had 3pm Saturday kick-offs – which would increase the gates in my opinion. And just for the record, Sky had no problem covering the SPL when Rangers had it won before a ball was kicked in the mid-90s.



    On your second point – Celtic have not been attracting big names for the last three or four years, the club has been investing in potential and recruiting from cheaper markets (perhaps preparing for the worst case scenario involving Rangers!) Other clubs like Aberdeen, Hibs, ICT, Killie and St Mirren have utilised the loan markets to their advantage, while snapping up some young players freed by bigger clubs. At any rate, the downsizing has already started.



    That leads to point three, and the fact you do not need to go down the road of investing in old players at the end of their careers. Scottish football is about to reach a crucial juncture and this is actually an opportunity to revolutionise the entire game.



    Should clubs, including Celtic, resort to youth (and they will have little other option) the short-term will be painful. But a more competitive league will emerge. Think back to the early to mid-80s when Aberdeen and Dundee United both reached European finals and, had Hearts not shat in the nest, by 1987 five different teams would have won the league in seven years. Four is still impressive. It may take seven or eight years but with young Scottish players developing at first-team level and getting a limited taste of European football the Scotland national team will benefit as well and the game will improve. Look at Cyprus at the moment, and for older examples Holland, Denmark and Norway all went down this read and everyone of those countries are stronger than Scotland.



    Rangers should receive the appropriate punishment. No ifs and no buts. They will be out of the loop for three or four years if the new club starts at the bottom. Giving Rangers a pass for cheating is what will kill Scottish football.

  7. Scored least goals in SPL, top two scorers unavailable, second worst defence in SPL, Hibs are certs to win tomorrow!!! ;-)

  8. Paul67 et al



    I think I posted good luck to Andy Murray on this site at around 8.30 this morning, and the match has just finished! Incredible! Great effort from Andy though.

  9. Nuclear Bovril and a Half Munched Pie on



    27 January, 2012 at 13:38



    Yes and Sooper Alloy must be ‘Number 2’

  10. Hearing lennon at the press conference today giving the same answers when we have failed to bring someone in.



    Don’t rule it out(signing).



    Working hard to bring someone in.



    Things are complicated.



    There are may factors that need to be considered.



    Fair to say I am not happy chappy right now after hearing this… :(

  11. If Lendl has that effect on Murray in a couple of weeks, then give them a few months together and he will be in with a great chance at Wimbledon and, especially, US Open.

  12. Stone Roses. Had me laughing on the way home in the car last night.



    So raise your glasses, here’s a toast to wasted lives


    May all their ghosts come back to haunt you


    And tell you how they died



    How do you sleep?


    How do you last the night and keep the dogs at bay?


    How do you feel when you close your eyes, and try and drift away?


    Does it feel any better now?


    Does it mean any more when the angel of death comes knock, knocking,


    And banging at your door?



    When all the fun was over, I put you on my shoulder


    took you home, away from it all


    Shot down and claimed, mounted and framed


    Tastefully hung up on my wall


    Are my dreams your nightmares? I hope they all come true


    Get off your knees, the party’s over


    I’m coming home to you



    How do you sleep?


    How do you last the night and keep the dogs at bay?


    How do you feel when you close your eyes, and try and drift away?


    Does it feel any better now?


    Does it mean any more when the angel of death comes knock, knocking,


    And banging at your door, at your door?




  13. Thank God Eurosport have now put slalom skking on, at last I can leave the TV alone and get some work done. Just need to leave CQN now . . .

  14. Magnus:



    Why have you not answered any of my questions fron yesterday?



    Why are you so intent on getting involved in a three year ongoing slagging match?



    Paul67 can confirm I have but one login.



    So what are you doing putting yourself so forward?



    I hope it has stopped raining down on you buddie and I hope you are still taking your medication mate.



    Watch that blood pressure.



    Have a nice weekend now Tom, I’ll be back.



    Oh and by the way… Tom… you are a LIAR.



    Is Paul67 going to bar me for saying that? If not then why not?

  15. playfusbal4dguilders on

    1346 FOOTBALL: Rangers manager Ally McCoist has confirmed Nikica Jelavic is out of Saturday’s Clydesdale Bank Premier League game against Hibernian. The striker – who was this week the subject of a failed bid from West Ham – will miss the clash at Ibrox through illness.








    Algarvian says:



    27 January, 2012 at 12:45



    They wil be asked the same amount of questions about the 19 point swing as smith was asked after being demolished at home by unirea





    The following season,Smith said that losing four goals in the CL at home TWICE was not going to happen again.






    Naturally,none of the assembled Scottish hacks had the cojones to question this line of reasoning,nor even to fall about laughing.



    They discredit an already discredited means of earning a pay-cheque,shamefully.



    Especially as I know plenty of proper journalists,and the research they do on a story is painstaking.

  17. The Pantaloon Duck on

    playfusbal4dguilders says:


    27 January, 2012 at 13:51



    Illness? Sick of playing for that mob?

  18. James Forrest is Lennon on

    First up, congrats to RTC for demolishing Darrell King’s nonsense on Radio Clyde last night, demonstrating, in King’s own words, how the media sat on the EBT story for months. Excellent annihilation of a professional liar ….



    In the meantime … on Jelavic …



    Scene from a Scouting Expidition Part 1015 – Celtic Park



    ENGLISH PREMIERSHIP MANAGER sits in tweedy style beside his CHIEF SCOUT. They have just run the gauntlet of Scottish hacks, easily identifiable by their whiskey breath and cheap shoes and now have taken their place in the Celtic Directors Box, next to a parade of international superstars like Gerard Butler, Rod Stewart, Billy Connolly, Dari…o Franchetti, Wayne Rooney and, hidden under dark glasses and a coat zipped all the way up, Henry Kissinger. Slightly to the left of them sits Rangers celebrity section, a pished Marti Pellow and Andy Cameron.






    PM: Why’d you tell those hacks we were here watching a striker? Heck, man, you have to learn to deal with the press. Tell them nothing. Now everyone’s going to talk and every other club is going to be interested …



    CS: Sorry gaffer, but they knew! They kept shouting at us ‘Are you here to watch Jelavic?’ Hey, at least I didn’t admit it ….



    PM: You should have kept it shut, that’s all I’m saying ….



    CS: Sure boss, sorry … Alright, well, let’s see what he’s got ….



    As the game wears on their intial excitement starts to dry up, as the player they are there to see performs like a geriatric alcoholic with the crabs (try and picture that scene if you will). CHIEF SCOUT, who recommended him after reading glowing match reports on STV.com, turns to the PREMIERSHIP MANAGER after one particularly awful moment to find him sitting in stark disbelief, eyes as big as Derek Johnstone’s dinner plates:



    PM: Hey … this guy … he’s garbage ….



    CS: Maybe it’s the cold … maybe he’ll perform better in the heat ….






    PM: The heat? We play in sodding Bolton … not Barcelona! You’re the one who recommended this clown … Where did you say you got those scouting tapes?



    CS: Ahem … I’ll get back to you on that one …



    PM: What a waste of time this was … That guy couldn’t get a game with our reserves. Who else do they have in their team?



    CS: Ahem … there’s the midfielder, Davis ….



    PM: Is he injured?



    CS: Playing central midfield ….



    PM: Playing where … ? What, you mean he’s out on the park? @@@@ sake …. Who else? Who’s on the bench?



    He says this having utterly dismissed the whole of the starting eleven.



    CS: Ahem … couple of kids, they’ve showed promise ….



    PM (Irritated): We need experience … Experience! Who else?



    CS: Ahem … Healy …. David Healy …



    PREMIERSHIP MANAGER stands up immediately ….



    PM: Right we’re out of here … Move yourself, grab your stuff … and if they ask, on the way out, who we were here to see, you tell them it was Samaras. Giorgios friggin’ Samaras … might as well attempt to save credibility ….

  19. Surely someone’s telling us something? Everywhere I look there’s tax this, tax that.



    Email update from People Per Hour today included:


    Tax doesn’t have to be taxing!




    This week, we have been providing our UK users with everything they need to know about taxes; just in time for the UK tax returns deadline at the end of the month.




    We hosted the first of two ‘Tax clinics’ in the Forum and our guru’s Catharine Harris and Elaine Clark were on hand to help many of you. Don’t worry if you missed it because we have published a FREE guide that should make taxes easier to digest!



    Free? An orcs favourite price.

  20. Dontbrattbakkinanger on

    I think this has been a good transfer window so far for us; we’re getting players in with a minimum of fuss.



    Getting a few surplus players out would make it an A, rather than a B+



    The team is playing well just now and Fraser Forster has been a big part of that improvement.



    We have a chance this weekend to book our place in a Cup Final.



    What’s not to like?



    Look where we were not so long ago, this has been a great turn round for which Neil Lennon and his coaches deserve a lot of credit.



    So I’m really not bothered what he says in his press conferences, the press are only there to catch him out.

  21. Dontbrattbakkinanger



    I would rather he said nothing than feed them excuses.



    We are doing brilliant and I can’t wait for Sunday(might be an even better day if hibs show up tomorrow). :)

  22. Philbhoy - It's just the beginning! on

    Can you imagine the press we’d be getting if the pantomime that is the huns, was happening to us?

  23. derbyshirebhoy on

    Having watched the Edinburgh game and accepting Hibs are very poor, the loss of Jelavic will be a major issue for Rangers tomorrow. Jelavic was the only noticeable difference between the sides at Easter Road.



    Hibs of course, awful as they, are stopped us from scoring at Celtic Park so a Rangers win is far from a foregone conclusion.


    BARCABHOY 1252






    Someone earlier posted a link to CSKA MOSCOW around midnight-can I please suggest,nay,beg,you find it and forward it?






    BTW,loved your first comment on the new RTC.



    Precise and to the point,or jugular………

  25. !!Bada Bing!! Kano 1000 on

    SS News leads with “another desperately disappointing day for British tennis….”,the boy’s a failure eh?

  26. Seven Fishes Four Steaks on

    Fanadpatriot, Murray is a great tennis player. He has just pushed the world number 1 and current holder of 3 slams to a 5 set thriller in nearly 5 hours. He regularly beats Nadal and Federer on the AtP, 2 legneds of the sport.



    I think you are being a tad unkind to Murray.




  27. Afternoon folks.



    I agree with the point Mr 67 makes about the standard of strikers coming in. For if he’s mince, why not use Murphy and rasmussen etc etc.



    But there’s surely a good chance that no one will be brought in. Disaster if one of the front pairing gets crocked it might be said. But not necessarily.


    We’ve a midfield abundance that could surely weather any storms and be as creative and attacking as we could wish for, no?



    One striker (hoops or stokes) with five in midfield. Vic at the back stomping his authority all over the place with some support from Joe (who can also get forward and will run and link up all day). Sitting just ahead of him would be Ki who, admittedly has the Barry Ferguson sideways habit, can also link up well and be a conduit for build up play and if the ball breaks to the edge of the area then we all know what he can do from distance, with both feet. Centre 3 sorted and all currently fit.



    Further forward, on left, Iris Commons back to terrorise full backs up and down the land. Some on here think that Forrest is just as effective behind the striker, and his pace and eye for goal as well as his link up and passing would suggest so. Sorted. Brown on the right.



    I may very well be wrong, but I see plenty of advantages to this set up if we lose a frontman.



    Defensively, Vic is a peach and Joe is no mug either. It allows Ki to not worry so much about it and concentrate on possession in thefinal third. Secondly, Commons is an attacker, Forrest is an attacker. Brown is no shy about getting forward. Forrest can roam that whole area and open space for Ki (or Ledley) to move into, and cover the right if brown has to help out the right back.



    More than anything it could give the team so much territory further up the pitch that it could be very very attack minded. So many options for a pass, people that can shoot from distance (pretty much the whole midfield) movement and covering. And all possible because the back four seems to have settled and the space In front is being patrolled and dominated by Vic.



    I don’t buy this idea that 5 in the mid is negative and stifles like the huns show it. Theres been plenty of euro teams playing with one up front and 2 or 3 forward thinking mids over the years, and playing well. We have a team that can link up and play footy on the


    deck, so that should make the idea work a bit better I think. That’s not even taking into account the starlight god shined toes of Paddy.




    And unlucky Andy Murray. Taking the no. 1 to the wire is no mean feat majors must surely follow. Let’s not forget he’s actually world class

  28. Dontbrattbakkinanger on

    Asonofdan- and I would rather you didn’t refer to him as ‘lennon’.



    So apart from the players we’ve succeeded in bringing in, which players have we ‘failed to bring in’?



    What are you not a ‘happychappy’ about?



    Surely not the current state of the ole Celts,so it must be the less than brilliant questioning of the assembled Hunguffrage at the PC? ;/)

  29. The Moon Bhoys on

    If we dont get anybody in would would love to see Rasmussen re-instated to the first team squad, still not clear on why we shipped him out.

  30. Philbhoy - It's just the beginning! on




    After the way Neil was treated by the media last season re the abuse directed at him and his family (God bless them) I honestly don’t think he wants to talk to them!



    He is, I feel doing it under sufference.



    He does not look interested and why should he?



    When the huns fold, the newspaper industry in Scotland will do the same.



    The sad thing about that is that some decent people will lose their jobs and that is never nice.



    But the despicable huns who are bringing the indusrty down will deserve all they get.



    In my opinion, of course.



    ………Low lie the fields of Athenry…..

  31. SFFS


    I know what you mean,but the comparison to Montgomery,at this moment,is valid.They bith compete at the highest level,but, are until now,not able to win a Grand Slam event.I admit Murray stills have time,but time is running out on him.

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