Michael, they have taken you away… from Ibrox


If you aggregate the nods, winks and rumours around Celtic this week you might be inclined to think we’re in the market for a target-man striker with a few years’ experience under his belt.  I agree with the principle that we need a target man and I’m also of the view that short-term deals are not nearly as desirable as permanent contracts, but as we know, it’s too easy to load the club full of squad players who cumulatively cost a lot of money but scarcely trouble the first team.

Hooper, Stokes, Samaras, Bangura, Rasmussen and Murphy are all under contract for next season and we cannot be confident of attracting bids for any of those Neil Lennon might want to move on.  If we add a seventh striker, his name better be on the team sheet before Gary Hooper’s.  Signing an exotic version of Daryl Murphy would add spice to our week but would only consume scarce resources.  I’d rather not.

Co-opting a media partner works in theory.  It’s always better to have good relationships with the media than the kind of relationships Celtic perennially have, but what happens when your media partner plays with a straight bat?

Rangers media partner, STV, today report Nigerian trialist, Michael Uchebo, boarded a plane out of Glasgow a few hours after arriving (Michael, they have taken you away….) as the VVV-Venlo striker with 8 career goals to his name had “a poor first impression of” Rangers.

Michael, you clearly have a rubbish strike rate but you’re a remarkably perceptive individual.

Issue 6 of CQN Magazine is currently being prepared; drop me a line if you would like to advertise, celticquicknews@gmail.com.

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  1. Dontbrattbakkinanger on

    Ole Johnny Clash – I usually refer to you as ‘ Supreme Being of the Timverse’



    ..or the Mhan Gerald Butler Wants to Be.

  2. Philbhoy - It's just the beginning! on




    Hardly hanging offences!



    At least he never stiffened anyone outside a kebab shop in Bothwell!



    Give the man a game!

  3. The Pantaloon Duck on

    Kayal33 says:


    27 January, 2012 at 14:34



    What do you have against Joe, putting him at left back again? One of these days, he’s gonna flounce…



    I’d put Izzy at LB, move Joe to left mid and play either wee James or Kris, but not both

  4. Dontbrattbakkinanger on

    No ‘rubbish records’ on the ole jukebox in the OBH.



    No rubbish bands on the stage.



    No unpleasant venereal catastrophes lurkin’ in the lassies’ bog.



    No mysterious substances forming a caustic scum on the head of your ‘beer’.



    Everything was 100% tickety-boo.

  5. A warrant for the arrest of Celtic star Morten Rasmussen has been issued over a speeding charge.



    Rasmussen was expected to appear at Glasgow District Court at 9.30am on Thursday. But when he failed to turn up JP Louisa Ross agreed to issue a warrant.



    She was told by depute fiscal Marie-Claire Anderson: “The accused does not reside at the address we have and his present whereabouts are unknown.”




    I think the fact, the polis with the press in tow were on their way, is what annoyed the board. Plus he is a Mowbray signing and we know how Lennon rates them…

  6. Kayal33



    I’d be surprised if Izzy doesn’t get a start tomorrow – after all, he was dropped so as to ease him into things. Surely not a second time?



    Brown and Wanyama is still a pretty good central midfield, although it went down a notch or two for me during the St Mirren game – Wanyama probably needs to get used to Captain ADHD (who had a superb game, before anyone shouts at me).



    Ledley is the worry in terms of recent form – he has dropped off considerably in his last 4 games. I still think he’s worth a go next to Wanyama in CM, even though this would be at the expense of Forrest.



    You may be right about Commons. Tomorrow, if he plays, should be a strong indicator as to the direction he’s going for the season.



    Did you know that, of the games Hooper and Stokes have started up front, we have won a staggering 101 points out of 108? Incredible.

  7. Fellows



    Way off topic.


    Ipod classic 5th gen. Bought 2006. My klipsch docking system is playing and charging (although for the past 6 hours) yet when I usb it comesup with ‘very low charge’ and doesn’t connect to iplayer. What gives?

  8. South Of Tunis on

    DBBIA —–



    Yup -the magnificent – Backstabbers — very apt for those serpents –



    As is The Undisputed Truth’s equally magnificent —Smiling Faces Sometimes.



    There is an equally good version by The Tamlins

  9. playfusbal4dguilders on

    1416 FOOTBALL: Neil Lennon claims Jorge Molina is just one of several players he is having trouble in attracting to Celtic. The 29-year-old Real Betis striker is the latest player to be linked with a move to the Parkhead club before the transfer window closes on Tuesday.

  10. The Pantaloon Duck says:


    27 January, 2012 at 14:44



    I would have him in the middle with Wanyama but Brown is an automatic choice so if you want to play 2 wide men then its Brown + 1 in the middle. Forrest has been our most influencial attacking player this season and Commons coming on last week turned the game for us. We are playing a 1st division team and Hampden is a large, wide pitch so why not play the wide men and go for it from the start.



    27 January, 2012 at 14:26



    Spot on re Rasmusson,I have stated before he is the sort of guy we need against the coming Inverness game as Hooper has never kicked a ball against that big stookie Tokely,mainly because he keeps waiting on the tackle.(from behind)



    Re the Civil offence mentioned,you could say he has company on that count sitting as a coach and I still rate him!!.

  12. He definitely wasn’t getting done for speeding on the pitch, that’s for sure.


    I would rather see Keatings get a chance than rasmussen.


    Since joining us he has failed to make an impression at Mainz, Aalborg and Sivasspor also.

  13. thebhoywithmcgraininhisside on

    I asked something like this last night and am still none the wiser. If any of you guys have any views they would be much appreciated



    I have a question regarding the outcome of the FTT and Rangers’ responsibilities to the SFA.



    At the beginning of each season all Scottish clubs, as I understand it, have to provide the SFA with copies of player contracts in order to correctly register their players for that season.



    Rangers’ position is that EBT payments to players were loans and so did not have to be declared to the SFA as part of the player registration process.



    Therefore, taking their view at face value, at the moment it may be said that Rangers have complied with this directive as player contracts detail completely the monies paid to Rangers players which have been subject to NIC and PAYE and so can be classed as wages.



    However, should the FTT agree with HMRC and find that “loans” paid to Rangers players from EBT’s were in fact subject to NIC and PAYE are they therefore deemed to be wages? And if not, why not?



    Does this mean that all Rangers players paid in this way were not correctly registered with the SFA in any of the seasons when these payments occurred?



    In effect, were these players ineligible to play for Rangers in competitive matches throughout the period EBTs were in use?



    If so, do results have to be reviewed and perhaps voided?



    Surely a Rangers side, which fielded ineligible players during this period must have any matches or indeed honours won rescinded on the basis that they cheated, a la Sion?



    I feel that the alleged contemporaneous side letters to players or their agents indicating that any loans to players would not have to be repaid is strong evidence that Rangers knew, or at the very least ought to have known, these payments to be wages.



    They knowingly, therefore, submitted falsified registration documents to the SFA and they should have to suffer both the footballing as well as the tax consequences of their actions.



    But it is of course a decision that the SFA will have to make. Any bets on which way they will go?

  14. Philbhoy - It's just the beginning! on

    I would play Izzy at lb with Joe in midfield.



    I think Joe adds a wee bit more creativity to midfiled and he can score wonderful, wonderful goals!



    Well, he is a hunskelper!

  15. playfusbal4dguilders says:


    27 January, 2012 at 14:37



    He was one of the most prolific scorers in the Danish league for about two seasons.


    He had just been called up to the Danish national squad when we signed him.


    It was actually known at the time that he took time to settle in and that he was a bit of a “lad” outside of football.


    He is known to be a confidence player so his current form probably is that of someone who seemed to have it all and now has feck all.



    IMHO I believe he just signed at the wrong time, a few days after he sign we sign big boot Keano and Rara’s fate was signed (oddly on the occassions that Mowbray played them together they looked lethal).



    Anyway better stop my rant. This is becoming my annual pointless agruement but I still believe in this guy.





    /Bishop B

  16. Philbhoy - It's just the beginning! on

    Jobo baldie…..



    Jimmy most certainly.



    In my opinion the other three were the second best in the world in their positions!




  17. The Pantaloon Duck on

    Kayal33 says:


    27 January, 2012 at 14:50



    I see your point, but 4-2-4 makes me nervous… and playing Joe at LB makes me nervous… and underestimating teams from lower divisions makes me nervous…



    But I do have a naturally nervous disposition. You must be made of sterner stuff :-)


    ASonOfDan says:



    27 January, 2012 at 14:34






    As far as Rasmussen is concerned it is nothing to do with ability. It is the fact Celtic got a call saying the polis were on the way to training with an arrest warrant because he failed to attend court on a speeding charge.



    He had been done for credit card fraud prior to signing for Celtic, he was given a chance and fecked it up.





    I’ve reposted the above so that the rest don’t have to flick back.



    The point I’m gonna make is that when clubs like Man U and even Bolton have people on hand for their players when they cannot open the door on their washing machine,much less deal with a traffic offence,I find that staggering incompetence on our part.



    We all know footballers tend to have their brains in their feet,they signed a player with a history-a one off,btw,of daft boayishness-and left him to his own devices in a foreign country?



    And when a MINOR infraction occurred,binned him?



    Tell you what,I would not go NEAR a company like that.

  19. Afternoon bhoys ,



    that was a quick morning watching AM – the fitness levels , never mind , the talent to do that for almost 5 hours – incredible. Well done AM , tough luck. Next time.



    I see FF has gone into meltdown re Jellylegs unavailability. Some of the dignified ones don’t believe TFPLG and there’s a wee bit of a fallout but they have a solution – play Elbows up front !! So , they’re sorted – he’ll be allowed to injure Hibee’s 2 centre backs before even being spoken to.



    On a final point ,




    The Kano Foundation



The Kano Foundation End of season fundraising dance will be held in the Kerrydale Suite at Celtic Park on sat 28th April. Tickets will be priced at £25 per head this will include a 3 course meal. Entertainment will be from Britiains no1 Michael Buble tribute act and a disco to finish off the night. We will be holding our usual raffle (prize donations welcome) and for the first time we have a fantastic auction prize. We hope to have a few special guests as well. look out for details of how you can purchase tickets on line. We hope you will join us for what will be a great evening.


    If you’re interested , please email eos@thekanofoundation.com



    Current list is (possibles in italics)



    Stephen Black +1




    CRC +1


    TTTT + 1






    Mouldy67 +1








    Bjmac +9

  20. up_over_goal says:


    27 January, 2012 at 14:48



    In fairness to Ledley he’s been one of our best and most consistent players this season.



    He has struggled slightly since being moved to left back but that’s not his natural position as you know.


    Dontbrattbakkinanger says:



    27 January, 2012 at 14:38



    BMCUWP- an oblique reference to the magnificent ‘Back Stabbers’



    They smile in your face..



    …and if that was a try-out for the ole Quiz Team your name is being filed under’ Nigerian trialists’ ;/)





    Haha,had anyone else said that,I’d have thought you meant GTF!


    Dontbrattbakkinanger says:



    27 January, 2012 at 14:45



    No ‘rubbish records’ on the ole jukebox in the OBH.



    No rubbish bands on the stage.



    No unpleasant venereal catastrophes lurkin’ in the lassies’ bog.



    No mysterious substances forming a caustic scum on the head of your ‘beer’.



    Everything was 100% tickety-boo.





    Ach,ye’ve nivir lived!

  23. hamiltontim



    Agree on Ledley’s consistency, but his ‘dull’ phase includes the games against DU and Peterhead, where he played mid.



    Only Sammi, Forster and Wanyama have been better so far this season imo.

  24. jude2005 is Neil Lennon \o/ on

    Twins on Pointless yesterday said they were womb mates. Well I thought it was funny!!

  25. Dontbrattbakkinanger on

    Modren klipsch docking system is rubbish.



    Anyways- Sannabhoy DBBIA + 1 for the ole Kano jamboree,please.

  26. Ahead of Sunday’s Scottish League Cup semi-final against Falkirk at Hampden, Lennon was asked what was happening with Molina.



    “Not a lot,” he replied.



    “I am no further down the line with any enquiries for players.



    “It’s basically as you were.



    “If the window shuts and we go with the squad we have then fine.



    “You are always looking to strengthen if you can but at the moment it is looking very difficult.”



    Meanwhile over at SOAP…



    “I just spoke to the doctor and he won’t be available (against Hibs),” confirmed McCoist.



    “He has a bug, a bit of sickness. The doctor went to see him on Wednesday and he wasn’t well, and went to see him again this morning.



    “I believe the family has had it as well and one or two of our younger players went down with it.



    “He won’t play for that reason.”



    On speculation over Jelavic’s future, McCoist added: “I believe there was a bid from West Ham on Wednesday that was rejected.



    “But I can absolutely assure you that the doctor has been to see him and he is not well enough to play and that’s a fact.”

  27. glendalystonsils on

    So, Smellyvitch is oot is he?


    Pity the Hibs are so mince that the borrowers could play lionel Healy up front on his own and still win.


    Then there’s always the ref………………..

  28. Gordon_J backing Neil Lennon says:



    27 January, 2012 at 14:17


    So what’s happening in the slalom then? No updates?






    Results of skiing.



    Alex Slalom won the independent downhill.


    Craig Whyte lost in the Tax free slalom.


    Next up is Ally McCoist in the Ski(high) jump. Oooo that lycra is snug.


    It is the “what happens next round”

  29. “He has a bug, a bit of sickness. The doctor went to see him on Wednesday and he wasn’t well, and went to see him again this morning.



    “I believe the family has had it as well and one or two of our younger players went down with it.”



    Now I can see how a big could be shared between family members. But the younger players? Has Jelavic been training with the youth team?

  30. James Forrest is Lennon on

    Yeah I am sure progress is hard for Lenny in trying to secure a new signing.



    It always is when the club WON’T SPEND MONEY.



    If we sign Fraser Foster for two million quid and do not buy a striker …



    Unbelievable. HOW MANY MORE TIMES FFS???