Ice cream, jelly and our profane enemies

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Trips to Inverness and Aberdeen offer the Celtic support travelling from the west of Scotland ample opportunity for the odd libation at early lunch stops along the way.  As a result, recent seasons have seen enemies of our club set their recorders to capture every utterance from the famous Celtic away support, keen to grab an opportunity to expose and exploit anything which could possibility cause offence.  These people are a bit like the National Viewers’ and Listeners Association, but with tattoos and a more libertarian take on profanity.

The ice cream and jelly show these guardians of public morals had to endure on Saturday would have caused ultimate distress.  Ultimate, that was, until Sunday brought a new level of consciousness.  And profanity.

It’s almost like everything is coming together for one side of the city while the other side is being Flushed Away.  Like a horrible wee jobby.

Yesterday may have been the most enjoyable day I’ve had reading Celtic Quick News.  As a result, I used the ‘share’ button at the bottom of each comment extensively.  If you are on Facebook or Twitter you can use this button to post your own comment, in context, to your social media facilities.

You can also use it to share, or give prominence to, any comment you think important enough for a wider audience, or simply because it is too funny not to share.  There is a lot of great material on here that deserves to be read as widely as possible.

By default, the share facility places the article title in the text box, which is not very helpful.  So if you use it (which I hope you do after the trouble Andrew in Belfast went to installing it in the first place), it’s a good idea to copy some of the comment and past that into the dialogue box.

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280 Comments

  1. Ice cream is one of life’s pleasures but unfortunately too much of it can result in the putting on of weight and a decline in physical fitness etc..

     

     

    Let’s get back to focussing on the game and preparing for a righteous humping of the Eastern Horribles. Winning there will drive another nail into the Hun coffin..

     

     

    Ice cream is much more enjoyable in the summer.

  2. LiviBhoy – Sorted

     

     

    chasbhoy says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 12:02

     

     

    LiviBhoy says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 10:48

     

     

    pabloh_AKA_NEIL LENNON says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 10:40

     

     

    I agree. They detest us more than anyone. I suspect it’s because Hibs are so bad. There is a sinister element to their support and there will be even more than usual this week as the Rangers fans are hurting. They will be in attendance with their mates.

     

    It’s not uncommon in Livingston and the east for Hearts and Rangers fans to attend each others matches and even change teams back and forward. I know two guys who have changed from Rangers to Hearts twice and back again. They go to Tynecastle when we are there and when they play Hibs.

     

    ————————————————————————–

     

     

    Here’s a thought from’ left field.’ It’s agreed that Ibrox has no real value other than as a football ‘stadium.’ The same can’t be said about Tyncastle – a potential development gold mine. Would it be outwith the bounds of reality that Romanov might buy Ibrox in a firesale and move west? He might lose most of William’s cousins, but could pick up at least the toxic element at Mordor. The combined players would make a half decent team to start with. Maybe thoughts from a different universe, but that bampot is capable of anything.

     

     

    LiviBhoy says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 12:09

     

     

    chasbhoy says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 12:02

     

     

    The Jambo’s would be gutted to move from Edinburgh. They are the dignity bearers of the East. They harp on about being the club from the capital and all their history and pride and all that tosh. Romanov would be taking a massive gamble but it wuld not surprise me. Their were rumours that they may move out to Livingston.

     

    Could we see a restructuring in Scottish football like never before. Teams merging and reducing the numbers in the professional leagues. I think the numbers of teams should be reduced anyway.

     

     

    Between 20 and 30 top clubs should be in the SPL/SFL and the rest should be in regional sub leagues with promotion and relegation. It would create a pyramid system that would suit everyone. It would also be a timely benefit for the HUN. It would ensure they move up the leagues quicker. I can see this type of restructure happening. The SFA will do everything they can to ensure Rangers (Newco) don’t languish down the leagues for longer than they have to.

     

     

    LB

  3. Neil Lennon is a craggy island gaa All-Star \o/ on

    Paul 67

     

     

    Jelly and Ice-cream for us…

     

     

    Jobby and Ice-cream for R*ngers…

     

     

    craggy

  4. Steinreignedsupreme on

    Paul67 –

     

     

    We’ve all had that problem with the odd jobby.

     

     

    Nothing wrong with tattoos by the way … some of my best friends, ect, ect, ect…

  5. If anyone is inclined to call the ‘phone in’ shows tonight then I think the key question which should be asked is :

     

     

    Shouldn’t the constitution be changed to allow Rangers back into the Scottish Cup in the interests of Scottish Football we all need them to be involved or we will all be in dire trouble…….

     

     

    Something needs to be done now to reinstate them.

  6. Awe_Naw_No_Annoni_Oan_Anaw_Noo on

    Auldheid

     

     

    I can remember an Italian friend of mine keeping me right with regards to the nuances for one of the Italian words for jobby.

     

     

    The call it stronzo But he did insist in a way that would have made Raymond Baxter proud that stronzo a small cylindrical jobby that is tapered at the end

     

     

    Ah a turd I thought.

     

     

    Hail Hail

  7. Neil Lennon is a craggy island gaa All-Star \o/ on

    Steinreignedsupreme says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 12:35

     

     

    We’ve all had that problem with the odd jobby.

     

     

    ——————————————————

     

     

    Would that be a wee beige jobby?

     

     

     

    craggy

  8. Aunt Sally

     

    “Craig as we all know, has received a good bit of stick this week, as has everybody at the club but I can only tell you, having met him three times this week and spoken to him on the phone every day, that we both want what’s best for the club.

     

     

    ”We both have different ways of trying to achieve that. I can totally understand his position but we both have the same target. I can understand why giving me the money from the sale of Jelavic isn’t in the best interest of the club – I’m not daft.

     

     

    ”He has a battle plan. I don’t have any doubt he’ll tell me what it is as he has a battle plan for every scenario whether we win the tax case or lose the tax case.

     

     

    “He’s organised and he knows what he wants but he hasn’t told me yet but I guarantee if and when it happens he’ll tell me what he believes is the way forward.”

     

     

     

    Keep these words for when Whyte disappears into the sunset a few million quid richer…

  9. Philvisreturns – some of us have been campaigning behind the scenes (like PL) to have the podium chase turned into a handicap event. Paul67 has added a few seconds to your initial posts.

     

    Think of yourself like Dancing Brave, but with Greville Starkey at the helm.

     

     

    HH.

  10. Paul67

     

     

    A bit below the belt with your “horrible wee Jobby” slant

     

     

    As far as i was aware Nacho Novo left Ibrox what 18 months ago

     

    so why do you want to drag his name up again.

     

     

    :>)

  11. Barloan Bhoy

     

     

    At Celtic the winner gets the cheque at half time. All the money is handed in by the sellers just after tyhe match has started.

     

     

    £1800 is that all? I got £6k on 2004 and its over £10k now.

  12. The Honest Mistake loves being first on

    Paul67

     

    These people are a bit like the National Viewers’ and Listeners Association, but with tattoos and a more libertarian take on profanity.

     

     

    It’s almost like everything is coming together for one side of the city while the other side is being Flushed Away. Like a horrible wee jobby.

     

     

    Are these peepul that you talk about Stool Pigeons?

  13. Steinreignedsupreme on

    This may be of interest to all Celtic fans and good people everywhere…

     

     

    – One pack of Rowntrees lime flavour jelly

     

    – Dilute in a measuring jug with 270ml of boiling water

     

    – Add 100ml of apple flavoured vodka

     

    – Add 75ml of vanilla flavoured vodka

     

    – Add 50ml of generic brandy

     

    – Add 25ml of undiluted orange squash

     

    – Top measuring jug upto 570ml line with cold water

     

    – Pour into jelly mould

     

    – Add mandarin segments**

     

    – Enjoy

     

     

    And remember – always eat responsibly…

  14. pedrocaravanachio67 on

    It’s almost like everything is coming together for one side of the city while the other side is being Flushed Away. Like a horrible wee jobby.

     

     

    ………………………………………………………………………….

     

     

    would have posted earlier, but spent the last 10 minutes cleaning my desk and monitor after spraying chicken soup up after reading the comment above.

     

     

    What a fantastic weekend, Average White Band on Friday night at the concert hall, watching our wonderful demolition of the highland huns on Saturday. Then the demolition of the real hun yesterday…………. put on top of that £50 on DU @ 7/1….nice.

     

     

    What else could top that off?

     

     

    Can i have hundreds and thousands on mine please.

     

     

    PC67

  15. lochgoilhead bhoy on

    Auld Neil Lennon heid says:

     

    6 February, 2012 at 12:25

     

     

    I like toly too. I remember this from my childhood in the 60s

     

     

    Keich, bum, toly, fart

     

    Kick the Rangers oaf the park

  16. philvisreturns_2 on

    tomtheleedstim – Philvisreturns – some of us have been campaigning behind the scenes (like PL) to have the podium chase turned into a handicap event. Paul67 has added a few seconds to your initial posts.

     

     

    I pooh-pooh this egalitarian nonsense.

     

     

    Poohsticks, sir! Poohsticks.

     

     

    Political correctness gone mad. (thumbsup)

  17. Lennon n Mc....Mjallby on

    Keech,toly,bum fart

     

    Went doon the public park

     

    Keech,toly could’ve swim

     

    Bum fart blew him in.

     

     

     

    Enough noo.

  18. Steinreignedsupreme on

    Neil Lennon is a craggy island gaa All-Star \o/: 6 February, 2012 at 12:37

     

     

    “We’ve all had that problem with the odd jobby.”

     

     

    I find the black variety tends to put up most resistance – that may be down to too much Guinness…

  19. Joe Filippis Haircut on

    I think with demise of the Poundland mob we should feel happy on many levels one of the good points is that we should get a crack at the Champions league every season.That should allow Celtic to build a quality pool of players as we appear to be doing at the moment I can see no reason why Celtic shouldnt reach the last 16 of the Champions league on a regular basis with the monies from this replaceing the monies from old firm games.So I m sure the demise of the poundland team could actualy see a stronger Celtic.H.H.

  20. I have just learnt that the skint mob are organising a campaign to raise funds to save their beloved club.

     

    They are going to every town in Scotland and elsewhere.Their war cry is Save Our Bears to be known as SOB.

     

    They are coming to your town.There will be SOB in Hamilton,there will be SOB in Govan,there will be SOB in Livingston.

     

    I would ask all Celtic supporters to get behind this campaign,go to the events and support the skint mob,when they have SOB in your town.Hail Hail.

  21. archdeaconsbench on

    Apologies in advance as I presume this has already been covered, but whats the story with the meeting tomorrow morning with the orcs? Is there a source re. information?

     

    Thanks… HH

  22. The language on here today is atrocious,hang

     

    your head Paul67.

     

     

    PrudentprudiceofprudenttownC.s.c

  23. Radio Manchester does an hour feature on Tuesday and Wednesday evenings on City and Utd. They focus on issues and interviews that are very pro either team.

     

     

    Was thinking the same could be used on Shortbread. Then again I am enjoying Blue Monday, Blue Tuesday, Blue Wednesday, Blue Thursday, Blue Friday, Blue Saturday and Even Bluer Sunday.

     

    Think these shows only have a few more weeks to then it will be Shortbread is green and white.

     

     

    Where will all the Hun meeja pundits go?