I learned that it’s important to choose the issues you have control over with your kids, and those you allow them to control. Let them take decisions that don’t really matter, as long as you decide the crucial stuff. Footwear was an early one for me. When the boys were younger, I realised how important it was for them to wear the shoes they wanted to wear, not the ones I thought right.
As long as they fitted correctly, it didn’t really matter which shoes they wore, so I let them have control over this issue. Instead of objecting to shoe choices, I supported them. They grew up learning how to make decisions on stuff like footwear, and kids are no different from the rest of us, they like making decisions on things that affect them. While I made them eat vegetables and rationed sweets.
If I turned to them now and said, “You’ll not get the wear out of them”, “They look ridiculous”, or “No, I don’t like the colour”, it would be so far removed from what they expect is their right to decide, they would think I was joking. But they still don’t bat an eye when I tell them what’s good for them and what’s not, because they know I only impose rules that matter.
We have other guidelines at work. We don’t wear jeans. Well not often. Because we’re all adults, sometimes people pitch up wearing them. I’ve never once asked why. Maybe it’s a laundry situation. Occasionally, I know they are going to do a stressful task in front of a PC for 8 hours, so assume they just want to wear what feels comfortable.
Sometimes I reckon it’s because people need a bit of scope to do their own thing, and as it doesn’t really matter, I worry about things which do matter.
There’s another feature of management I’ve seen in business. Every manager needs to make decisions. It’s part of what we expect of ourselves when we are appointed. No one has ever sat down with a manager to carry out a review and been told, “We’re doing just fine, nothing’s going to change”.
If the manager has scope to make significant improvements, the changes will be ambitious. From others, you will get plans for a new Tidy Desk Policy.
Newco manager, Pedro Caixinha, has informed his players they cannot wear green boots, as that is the colour of Celtic. Set aside the fact that this is a contrived attempt to create faux rivalry – it simply won’t. This is a serious contravention of the rules of leadership.
Setting rules about stuff which no one should care about, is self-demeaning. It costs the rule-maker credibility, and credibility is everything in leadership. Especially in a football dressing room.
This guy will be lucky to see the September Weekend.
NEW CQN PODCAST WITH SFA PRESIDENT ALAN RAE OUT NOW!
Episode 2 of ‘A Celtic State of Mind’ finds Paul John Dykes and Kevin Graham discussing a variety of topical subjects concerning Celtic Football Club, including:
* Callum McGregor: The Youth of Today;
* Death of the Cult Hero;
* Norwegian Wood – Ronnie Deila’s Exit Interview;
* Farewell to The Stone Roses;
* Hillsborough: The Truth.
Paul John Dykes also chats to SFA President, Alan McRae, to challenge him over recent comments made about Celtic’s domination of Scottish football.
Connect with A Celtic State of Mind @PaulDykes and @CQNMagazine or just listen using the link below…
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POGMATHONYAHUN AKA LAIRD OF THE SMILES
Sleeps with the fishes:))
Shuffling is more of a sport than Darts, or Snooker or other pub games, so for me, that qualifies.
They are expensive but a website called Sports Pursuit had them at a very special price a short time ago, and nostalgia got the better of me.
Happy Birthday to the EX weatherman. Jobo, The King of the Curve.
JJ
Hooooooopy birthday Jobo
One more thing,
Happy Birthday Jobo. Hope you’re having a great day.
I left 55 in my wake a couple of weks ago. Absolutely painless it was ( until the next day )
IN 2002 I bought my first home, a flat just off Duke Street in Dennistoun, in Glasgow’s East End. I loved the high ceilings and cornices, the big rooms. I had lovely neighbours and there was a strong sense of community. Living there took me back to my roots, too; I was born in Duke Street Hospital and we’d lived in a nearby tenement before moving to Fife.
What I didn’t love about that flat, however, was the problem that eventually resulted in me moving away: its proximity to Glasgow’s sectarian heartlands. Not only did I live across from a practise hall for Orange bands, but every year a small but significant section of the warm, close-knit community I had come to know and love split itself along religious lines and transformed into a two-sided choir of hate.
At the height of the marching season Duke Street and the surrounding districts would become a tense, sometimes aggressive cauldron. Over the years I was mugged, jeered and leered at by drunks, inconvenienced on countless occasions by noise and street closures. The last straw for me came on one marching day when I witnessed a cute, smiling three-year-old shout “Fenian” at a wee boy in a Celtic strip.
I started my own campaign, complaining to environmental services about the noise of the bands, urging the Scottish Government to ban all things related to sectarianism including, I recall, two rather well-known football clubs. But mostly I wrote letters to the Council demanding an end to the marches. It’s their right to march, is it? What about my right as a non-religious person to a peaceful life devoid of sectarian nonsense, I would bash out on my computer, probably in capital letters. Needless to say, I got nowhere, and defeated and deflated I moved to the south side of Glasgow, where there is far less marching. I’ve never regretted it.
I thought of my previous existence as “furious from Dennistoun” as I watched the 4,500 sashed and gloved Orange Order members stride towards Glasgow Green accompanied by flutes and drums on Saturday. Did I feel the same the anger and offence 15 years on? My reaction took me by surprise; I didn’t feel anything much at all, other than a bit embarrassed when I saw the confused tourists.
In fact, I even felt a pang of sympathy for the marchers, trying to retain the pride and self-importance provided by their closed little world, but increasingly marginalised and deemed irrelevant by the changing society around them. They probably know in their heart of hearts their days are numbered.
On Saturday there were a few related drunken skirmishes, but just eight arrests were made – all for minor offences – down from last year’s 13, also a relatively small number. I visited friends in Dennistoun in the late afternoon and Duke Street was notably normal – high-spirited yes, reeking of sectarian hatred, no. It felt so very different from the tense, menacing place it would morph into years ago.
Clearly something is changing around the tone of Orange marches and the effect they have on both sides of the sectarian divide. But what? In my view the diversification of Glasgow’s population over the years, its reinvention as an arts and culture hub that attracts people from all over the world, the more confident Scotland with its own parliament, the fact we are all grappling with far more important divides, such as Brexit and whether or not we want to be an independent country, have all made the Protestant v Catholic dynamic seem increasingly archaic and daft. The growing influence of women on society and the embracing of identities outside of religion have also played their part, I reckon. Indeed, a recent social attitudes survey found that a record 58 per cent of Scots described themselves as having no religion, up from 40 per cent in 1999.
Watching the march at the weekend also made me realise that I was both naïve and wrong to demand the banning of such events. It was still inconvenient and embarrassing for many Glaswegians, and it was still hard for me to understand why anyone would still choose to hold sectarian views. But it is their right to march for what they believe in, no matter how outdated, even offensive, others may find it, as long as those taking part don’t try to force their views on others.
If anti-austerity or pro-independence groups are allowed to march and hold rallies, which also cause inconvenience to drivers and pedestrians, then the Orange Order and their supporters must have their day, too. No platforming not only goes against free speech, but diverts attention away from debating the real issues, whatever they may be.
If Scotland continues to change and progress, as I hope it will, it is likely that Orange marches will be perceived as even more odd and irrelevant, eventually fizzling out of their own accord.
Calling for a ban simply makes those who organise such events feel even more righteous and sinned against. Better to turn the other cheek and concentrate our scrutiny on the only Orange men and women that hold any real influence these days: the DUP.
@mariannetaylor features writer herald scotland
Starry, :-)))
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8nyON_VDIhw
POGMATHONYAHUN AKA LAIRD OF THE SMILES
Was just thinking it’s a long time since I watched the Godfather:))
Whit a cast:))
Starry, correct the cast was phenomenal and all brilliant actors. Unlike some who occasionally appear on here pretending to be Celtic fans ;-)
THE GREEN MAN SAYS SACK THE BOARD on 3RD JULY 2017 5:29 PM
MIT
I was on my own last night battling ‘dark entities’ on the blog:)
I will be there to back you up tonight,armed with a wee plastic bottle of water from The Virgin Marys House.
“dark entities”indeed.I laugh in their face.
Jobo
Many happy returns of the day auld yin, have a great time.
No coloured boots.
Shuffling,as a sport.
Soon be Celtic Zimmerframe News.
In saying that,I remember the day,many moons ag ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
POGMATHONYAHUN AKA LAIRD OF THE SMILES on 3RD JULY 2017 5:58 PM
Starry, correct the cast was phenomenal and all brilliant actors. Unlike some who occasionally appear on here pretending to be Celtic fans ;-)
Or some that come on with their head firmly ,it seems,too far up their own jacksy.
Smiley.
Starry
Re the Godfather had the box set with additional scenes and features. One was the auditions for different parts was very good plus some great interviews back in the day. Godfather 2 might top it tho. Godfather 3 oh dear!
Kikinthenakas #barrynorman
Jobo:
A big 55 to you, trust your having a hooptastic day…
Keep the Faith!
Hail Hail!
KIKINTHENAKAS
Box set on D/L now:))
BOURNESOUPRECIPE on 3RD JULY 2017 5:49 PM
i read all that thinking what possessed you to buy a flat across from the practice hall,
but it was some other eejit.
-)
good evening from Manchester Airport which has the misfortune this evening from being polluted by huns going to Luxembourg. Not content with just being scum they of course had to sing a loud sweary song to a person who was wearing an Aberdeen tracksuit top. Lovely eh? They are the peepil after all……..
Hmm,
Huns in Manchester. It was never going to end well, was it.
Greenock Fair?
https://twitter.com/hms1986/status/881279650047164416
Any Hoops coming in from Prague tomorrow evening take care, a flight from Luxembourg is in 10 minutes earlier.
Skybet offering prices on which club certain players will be signed to, come the end of transfer window.
Looked yesterday and noticed our M. Dembele is listed with following odds
available…
4/5 Everton
11/10 Celtic
9/1 AC Milan
20/1 Chelsea
20/1 Tottenham
20/1 Dortmund
I thought they must know something?
Everton planning for Lukaku’s departure?
Today, Everton announce signing £5.2m forward from Malaga – good news for us (I think) but odds remain the same!
Mmm
Breithla Shona Jobo….Going for 56.
You would think that their”minds” might be occupied by things a bit more substantial than their “players” wearing green boots.
Haaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaa.
Oh the DUP won’t like this, lol
British army barracks in Germany
Pog- seen a few boots with those colours on Saturday…;))
Jobo- all the best HH
STARRY PLOUGH
” Low key shuffling”
Had to be Clarks Wallabee or Clarks Desert Trek !
There is a fine book on the subject-
Clarks In Jamaica-Al Fingers.
“and rationed sweets”!
You monster! It was bad enough with making them eat vegetables, but you went too far with that one bhoyo!
:-)
Patrick Roberts 11/8 Fav to be signed by Celtic by Sept 3rd.
(5/1 to remain a Man City player)
Courtesy Skybet
Happy Birthday Jobo from the Kelvin Court posse (currently in Cala D’or). All the best.
TURKEYBHOY-9:53am,absolutely spot on,enjoy the breeze:-)
SOUTH OF TUNIS
Me nah Rude Boy ya know:))
Feliz Cumpleanos Jobo
……………………………………….
Nephew who will be eight soon has a fixation about Jonny Hayes.
I would really appreciated an autograph for him, if emby can help I would be eternally grateful.
He is called Ben
What a magnificent major shareholder, chief executive, board of directors and manager we have.
Flaky Pastry alert
TGM, lol.
Wawrinka pumped in 4.
Didny look fit.
C’MON ANDY!!
What was the point of the McCrae interview?